Alcohol ...

[Linda]

Thank You annke...could you explain to us what you mean by "It fights with my ritalin? I think it is a very important statement....Linda

[finnmom]

Anneke

Your post brought back memorie´s. I was in Belgium age´s ago(about 13 y) one thing I remember clearly was that anyone could by alcohol from grocery-store(here it´s liquor-store´s only for anything stronger than beer). That was a schock for me and my sister, and we both were over 18 then.

Another thing that schocked us was visiting Amsterdam, we stood at the big market-place of the city and I could see the cloud over the groud sitting there There was a lot of people smoking marihuana, right there in the midle of day ewwww

I dont say that everyone in there use something, NO, but it was much more liberal than in here, still is I think.
I have a strong NO against drug´s, smoking I dont like at all.

Marja

[catatonic]

This is a subject I've thought about a lot, for a couple of reasons. First is that my husband, although he hasn't had a drink in many years, is an alcoholic. His entire family is alcoholics...all the brothers, uncles, grandparents, parents. That puts our children at risk of becoming alcoholics as well. Second is the research indicating that teens with ADHD are at significantly increased risk of engaging in dangerous behaviors such as drinking, taking drugs, and having unprotected sex. Is it that old impulse control thing again?

Studies show that teens are more likely to abuse alcohol if they were brought up in one of two types of homes:
1.) a home where alcohol is abused
2.) a home where alcohol is never consumed
Children whose parents model moderate drinking for them are least at risk of becoming alcohol abusers.

My husband obviously doesn't drink at all. He can't. I don't really like to and rarely have any alcohol...maybe a glass of wine a couple times a year. My dad, however, likes to put his feet up with a glass of whiskey and watch the news. My brother drinks a beer or two while watching basketball. I think it's a good idea for the kids to see what responsible, non-pathological drinking looks like.

On the other hand, I have gone to great lengths to brainwash them on the evils of alcohol. I hope they will choose not to drink and I make that clear to them. If they do choose to drink, I pray they'll drink responsibly -- not get drunk, not drive after drinking, etc -- and I make that clear to them as well. Only time will tell whether this has been effective or not.

My oldest son, now 15, makes lots of jokes about drinking beer. Some of his fellow high school students get drunk and tell the other kids about it. He's pointed out to me on a number of occasions when I've picked him up at school where groups of kids hide to smokeit. A kid on the bus has asked him if he wanted to get stoned. They are exposed to this stuff every day. I worry about it all the time. I know that resisting such temptation and peer pressure will be most difficult of all for my third son, the one with ADHD, when he gets a little older.

So I'm going to go with the "goody goody" group here. If I believe drinking is dangerous, potentially addicting, often humiliating, always expensive, and sometimes fatal, I'm going to make it as difficult as possible for my children to do it...especially under my roof where I get to make the rules.

[AnneM]

Wow !! There are some really interesting responses here ...

Anneke ... Thankyou for your thoughts and experiences on this ... and as Linda says the bit about alcohol fighting with the ritalin is especially significant! ... I have read that drinking alcohol whilst on ritalin can make you particularly "drowsy" ... would you agree with that? I have also read that one or two beers on ritalin is not a big problem BUT it is inadvisable to have "too much"... ?

Catatonic - the study you mention is particularly interesting ... and also the mention of genetics in the family posing a bigger risk.

I remember when Sam was 11 years old and I worked with a lady who's son was (at the time) 15. I always remember her saying "At 15 all they want to do is get drunk... " and I was SO HORRIFIED and extremely worried! ... BUT I can also honestly say that now Sam is 15 going on 16 this is SIMPLY NOT TRUE!! ... I have NEVER seen Sam anywhere near even approaching "drunk" ... even when we have been in Spain and he has been out with friends on an "open ticket" to consume alcohol ... (because they will serve him without question there!)

I have ALSO read from people's own experiences around the web that taking ritalin n fact reduces the need or want to consume alcohol ... but that is another subject (but a potentially interesting one!) ...

[anneke]

my ritalin fights means that I feel that my energy drags out of my bothy, the same feeling I have when my sugar level is to low or when you have heavy diaria.

my harts speeds up, I get it verry hot. by the seccond beer my bothy was chocking and other people got more scared then me. I went to bed and the next mornig I was fine again. I already feel it after one beer.

my brother has no problems with his ritalin and alcohol.

marihuana is easy to get in holland. there are spacial shops where yuou can get your stuff and the quality is good ( there are laws about the quality)

in belgium it is leagel to smoke but not to sell so it comes from holand. in Belgium it is not aloud t o smoke it in public but nobothy cares.

I think these laws are stupit and there should be better laws about alcohol too.

[camismom]

Boy, this is an interesting topic. I agree with two different opinions I have read here. One is that I will tell Cami that I would prefer her to not drink, she will not be allowed to in front of me until she is of legal age, yet if she ever does and gets out of control, to call me before she gets behind the wheel of a car. I will get her no questions asked. I have always been a firm believer that you can absolutely forbid your kids to do something, but you can't stop them when they're not with you. You don't know what goes on behind your back. You can say "you better not drink" but when they're with their friends and peer pressure kicks in, you can't control them then. You can only hope your influence, teachings, and positive role modeling will make them make the right choice.

I grew up in a home where alcohol was never seen or even mentioned. No one in my family drinks and I have never seen any of them so much as touch one.... with execption of my mom's third husband. He was an alcoholic and when she was married to him our house wreaked of beer and to this day I can't stand the smell or taste of it! The day she left him we had to step over his drunken passed out body in the hallway to get out. That made an impression on me. When I became a teen of course my friends and peers were all drinkers anditsmokers. I was not. I believe the fact that noone in my family ever did it, or gave me a taste of it, made me not want it or like it. I can't say I didn't try, but I hated the taste of the beer and the smell of it. I choked when I tried smoking and didn't like that, so I made a decision that it wasn't for me. I was actually quite popular with my friends for being strong enough to stand up against the pressure.

Me ex-husband was given tastes of beer by his dad at a very young age. This gave him the "taste" for it early on and he liked it. He is now a heavy beer drinker.

My dh's father was a heavy liquor drinker. He was an alcoholic and my dh watched him abuse his mother many many times while drunk. My dh put his father in the hospital once when he came home from school and found his father beating his mom. He got a bat and hit him across the head with it to get him to stop. Andy was nine at the time. Three years later he watched his father die a very long, miserable death from cyrrosis (sp?) of the liver caused by years of heavy drinking. My dh became a pretty heavy drinker as a teen despite having witnessed this. He was even arrested once as a teen for drunk driving! Luckily he recognized early on that he, like his father, couldn't tolerate liquor. It makes him "mean" as he puts it, so it is something he does not touch. The arrest opened his eyes to the dangers of drinking and driving and he has never done that again. That coupled with seeing a few school mates buried from doing just that. Anyway, he is now a beer drinker only, has been since I met him. He is what you call a social drinker. When we first married I worried that he drank too much at these social occasions (i.e., while spending a day relaxing on the beach), and I didn't like it. I still don't like him drinking because I am just not accustomed to it. Thanks to our becoming stronger in our faith and church, the drinking has decreased to a VER rare minimum.