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Post by AnneM on Feb 1, 2004 8:24:19 GMT -5
About a month ago I was reporting on my son and his friend with the £10 note (which was eventally returned) ... but now something has happened which has further shattered my son's trust in people.
On Friday evening a group of 5 teenagers asked if they could come round and listen to my son's music etc ... These are NOT his good friends but he knows two of them reasonably well ... and the other three tagged along ...
Throughout the evening my son lost around 15 of his highly treasured) music albums ... One boy (the prime suspect) had "suddenly" disappeared earlier in the evening without telling anyone he was going ... we now believe that he had the albums on him and hence his hasty retreat. HOWEVER, it also seems that the "others" must have been aware/involved in this ... The boy disappeared just after my son went to speak to another friend altogether at the door (hence my son was out of the room for a few minutes) ...
The "prime suspect" for the actual theft is a boy who my son has never liked and who is normally not welcome in the house. However, on Friday because he was with these other boys - in he came ...
So although we think this boy actually DID the thieving there is a big question mark about the others ... Did they push him to do it? They MUST have seen the theft take place ... but everyone of course denies it!! ...
I am just thankful that these are NOT my son's usual group of friends .... they had come round as a "one off" ... (and will certainly never be welcome again!) ... his "real/usual" friends are outraged that this happened and are determined to help Sam get to the bottom of this ...
I doubt though that we will ever actually REALLY know the truth of what happened on Friday ... what really does hurt though is to see the disappointment, anger and hurt in my own son who is SOOO TRUSTING of people as a rule ... He always seems to learn his lessons the hard way and this is another example! ...
This morning he said to me "The only people I can trust now are my family and some of my friends" ... I guess that is the way it has to be?...
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Post by Linda on Feb 1, 2004 8:46:30 GMT -5
Ann...Did you call the police? It is not to late to do so...these boys can not get away with what they have done.This sort of thing makes me so angry!!!Poor Sam! Please do NOT let these kids get away with this..believe me they will do it again.  |
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Post by AnneM on Feb 1, 2004 9:01:21 GMT -5
Hi Linda ... we have had an update ... one of the guys who was there on Friday has told Sam exactly what happened... and it had NOTHING to do with the kid who left early ... (He just had to go) ... It was instead apparently the two boys who Sam ACTUALLY KNOWS !! ... This of course just hurts Sam even more because he has always looked up to those two (who are older than him) ... Oh Linda ... We are actually wary of getting the police involved ... I do know that is what we SHOULD do ... but these boys worry me (and Sam)... if the police get involved (because Sam has called them) the repercussions could honestly (on Sam) be frightening ... and apparently these albums were taken to LONDON last night for a party ... and they were then LEFT IN LONDON so are no longer in the possession of these two thirves ... which means the police would actually find nothing and in turn couldn't charge anyone!! ... Oh what a vicious circle!! >:  |
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Post by mctavish23 on Feb 1, 2004 9:15:20 GMT -5
Hi,
I'm very sorry to hear of your son's loss.Things seem to happen for a reason, even if I have no clue what that is.Hopefully, his property will be returned. I also beleive that "what goes around come around".
I like your positive attitude and you and your son have my very best wishes.
mctavish23(Robert)
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Post by AnneM on Feb 1, 2004 9:51:31 GMT -5
Thank you Robert ... I thought about "the reason" or maybe a "moral of the story" behind this one and I think it might be that it has really made Sam VERY appreciative of his "real" friends today ... They all rallied around and were outraged by what had happened on Friday (none of them were here that evening) ... and it seems that my 15 year old is certainly valuing his TRUE friends right now ....
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Post by Dad2Brooke on Feb 1, 2004 10:29:17 GMT -5
Anne I am sorry that those hooligans took advantage of Sam's good nature. I also believe in Karma and what goes around comes around.
Sam has learned a valuable lesson, but more importantly he truly knows who his real friends are.
This is a prime example, I believe, of instinct. Sam didn't feel easy around these boys in the first place and now he knows why.
As far as involving the police, they probably won't be able to do anything. Although it may give you the satisfaction of reporting them, if it causes Sam repercussions it may not be worth it.
IMHO, I would chalk it up to another hard learned lesson and let it go at that.
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Post by finnmom on Feb 1, 2004 10:36:06 GMT -5
Anne  That´s terrible Your Sam has had his share of "good lesson´s" lately, hopely it´ll end soon. I agree that getting police involved, as attempting as it sound´s ;D, might not be a good i´dea, too risky. Plus-side is, as been said, that now your son truly know´s his friend´s, it´s also good for him that his true friend´s supported him so visibly, make´s him to realice the value of himself and good friend´s. Marja |
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Post by AnneM on Feb 1, 2004 11:57:10 GMT -5
Thankyou SO much everyone ... this really makes ME value YOU guys hugely - because just like Sam's friends you too are rallying around and helping more than you will ever know  Of course the realisation that it was these two individuals who were the thieves has given Sam another "quandry" ... he is now not sure how to react when he next sees these two individuals!! ... He said his gut instinct is to flatten them (but then he often says that but has never done it so I don't think he will this time either!) ... One of the two left their expensive headphones here and will no doubt need to come around and collect them (!) ... Sam is asking what should he do/say ... I am not sure ... I said to give the guy the headphones ... under NO CIRCUMSTANCES invite him in ... be extremely COOL ... and basically just say "There are your headphones ... Goodbye"... (On the other hand I guess he COULD say "Well I sold the headphones to get some of the money back on the albums I lost!!" .... ;D Any other ideas would be really appreciated... THANKYOU EVERYONE .... |
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Post by Dad2Brooke on Feb 1, 2004 12:08:08 GMT -5
Karma...
Guys steals albums, accidentally leaves expensive headphones...
Or would that be irony?
If I was Sam, and I was absolutely sure that "headphone guy" was involved in the theft, then I would offer to trade headphones for my albums. Nevermind, that the albums are now in London and "headphone guy" may not be able to get them back (he shouldn't have taken them in the first place.)
If he didn't give me back my albums, then I would have a new (expensive) pair of headphones.
Usually, what goes around, doesn't come around so quickly!
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Post by Linda on Feb 1, 2004 13:09:05 GMT -5
I am with Ralph...I would hold the headphones "hostage" until Sam got his property back. I reall don't think the litttle "hoodlum" is going to come back and ask for them.If he does he is a really big idiot!
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Post by AnneM on Feb 1, 2004 13:20:19 GMT -5
Oh Ralph and Linda I think you are so RIGHT !! ;D (and Ralph I see exactly what you are saying so far as karma is concerned! ) & Linda I also don't THINK "headphone guy" will be back to ask for those headphones!! ... but it will be VERY interesting to see IF he turns up for them !! .... ... and "headphone guy" (I love that turn of phrase!!) was the original one who asked Sam if he ("and a few others") could come round to our house in the first place .... and it was of course "headphone guy" who was one of the two major instigators in the whole thing!! ... so I think "headphone guy" can forget his headphones until albums (which are now in London!) are returned!! .... BRILLIANT!!! Thankyou !! sometimes when you are "in" a situation you can't see the wood from the trees ... but THANKYOU for helping me to see it!! ... I will keep you posted ... it will certainly be interesting to see whether "headphone guy" appears at our doorstep!! |
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Post by anneke on Feb 1, 2004 15:35:03 GMT -5
my brother had the same 1 time and they traded the stuf back. And a few cd are not that heave to send by post.
Anneke
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Post by Honeysmom on Feb 1, 2004 15:42:23 GMT -5
I agee with LInda and D2B completely, but I wort of lost track of who was who in the story so I thought of something else.
If the Headphone Guy is not the one who took the records then it really would not be fair for Sam to hold him accountable for someone else's actions. I know what happened to Sam was also not fair, but this would not make it right. Sam has been learning many valualbe lessons lately and many it seems will make him a better adult. He is learning what it means to be a real friend and how to be a good friend. I don't want to offend anyone with my opinion on this, but I am seeing it from a differnt angle.
Now, if in fact the Headphone Guy is the one who took the records then I would by all means keep the headphones until the records are returned or replaced. But if he is not Sam will also learn that even though he was taken advantage of it wouldn't be right for him to take advantage of somene else, and in a way that is what would be. Just my 2 cents worth.
Sorry to go against the grain on this one.
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Post by kstquilter on Feb 1, 2004 18:12:35 GMT -5
well i have to agree with the majority on this. hold those headphones hostage until the albums are returned.
sounds like "headphone guy" was involved in some form and even if he isn't the one who took the music, his friends obviously did. which means that even if he didn't actually take them, he has influence over the ones who did and should be able to use his influence to get the music back.
it truly is hard to watch our kids be hurt in all the many forms they do when it comes to their social circles. but if he's learned who he can count on, he's learned more than alot of people do in a lifetime.
karen
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Post by LitlBaa on Feb 1, 2004 20:39:56 GMT -5
I'm going with the tide on this one. Seems like a fair trade to me. Karen's right, even if he didn't actually take them, he knows who did. And he should be able to use his influence to get the stuff back.
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