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Post by TexasMom on Oct 29, 2004 21:00:31 GMT -5
Steven is in 6th grade and the first year of middle school.
This all starts AFTER we had our yearly IEP meeting of course. Steven has had two detentions in the last week. The first was last monday for being late to PE.
The school wants him to stay in for detention this monday because he didn't return the detention slip from the last detention. To top it all off, during detention, the kids have a packet of written work to do as to why they are in detention. "I was late because I..." This blew any hope of doing homework.
I'm inclined to go to the school and have Steven not do the detention, and if I have to, call another ARD to have detentions approved by me before they give them to Steven. I didn't mind the detention for being late, but this second one...
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Post by AnneM on Oct 31, 2004 12:49:03 GMT -5
Wheeew! ... I sympathise ... Detentions were often a "bug-bear" for me .... they seemed to serve "no real purpose" .... and I do see what you are saying about the second detention being a detention for not handing in the slip for the first detention! ... However, sadly, the one thing I did learn during my son's school years was ... rightly or wrongly .... if he is asked to do a detention he should do it ... because as soon as you step in and start rejecting detentions you COULD be making a rod for your own back (i.e. "Oh Mum got me out of the last one ... so she'll get me out of this one") .... I am not for one minute saying your son would do this but I KNOW my son would have done if I had ever stepped in against a detention!!  However, it wouldn't hurt to let the school know privately how you feel (I did on some occasions).. i.e. "He WILL be doing the detention because he has been requested to do the attention .... but this is much against my better judgement because ..... " GOOD LUCK IN WHATEVER YOU DECIDE! |
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kendra
New Member
Mother of three; two with Asthma, one with allergies, one with ADHD.
Posts: 22
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Post by kendra on Oct 31, 2004 12:49:15 GMT -5
It seems to me that your son will start to hate school if he keeps getting detention. I can see one for being late but to have them start snowballing like that would be tough on any kid. I think you're on the right track in questioning though. Good luck!
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Post by mskris on Nov 1, 2004 13:33:25 GMT -5
I'm with you. What purpose does it serve to punish him after he already served the first detention. Also, to have him write an explanation is fine, but not in lieu of doing his homework! I think detention is ridiculous, personally, I'd rather have them give an assignment so the kid actually LEARNS something, rather than just learning to avoid detention...
I'd make a stink, but then, that's me. I will forever be an embarrassment to my kids, I fear. My mom was the same way, and the only thing I can say is that we were so afraid of her embarrassing us at the school that we never got into any trouble!! LOL. Maybe that was her plan all along??? Hmmmmm.
Kris
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Post by rosyred45 on Nov 1, 2004 13:47:30 GMT -5
I reallly don't know what to tell you except that my husband got to the point in school where he'd skip dentions to get internal, skip internal to get external suspensions  Now if he were mine, mind you, he'd not have had the detentions in the first place. But, I would have a talk about the detentions to the principal. Yes you understand that there are consequenses, BUT given that he has as IEP, would it be possible to take care of things, like official notification via- e-mail as well as hard copy? That way you know to remind him about turning it in and all. Don't know if htat helps, but don' want him taking the road my husband did.  |
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Post by TexasMom on Nov 1, 2004 21:37:10 GMT -5
Well, I talked to the vice principle today and reminded him that Steven has ADHD and has to be reminded six times everyday to put on his shoes and socks so I really didn't think he understood that he needed to return the detention slip. It took him a while, but I finally convinced him that it would do more harm than good, and he's going to give Steven another chance. If Steven doesn't return the slip tomorrow, he gets another detention. I also told Steven that this is the ONLY time that I would bail him out and that in the future he needs to listen to his teachers.
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Post by rosyred45 on Nov 1, 2004 22:32:30 GMT -5
Thank goodness you were given another chance. BUT they need to take that into consideration or you end up with :-[my husband I hate to say that too, BUT just talking to him he is the typical ADHD kid before it was mentioned.... Hope he remembers it |
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