School has just just started and I want to scream!

[CJsMOM28]

Hello all!This is my first time over here at the education section,I've read alot of good info,this seems like such a great place for feedback and support,I'm glad I have found you guys!

Hate to start off with a gripe...but here goes! My Son is in the fourth grade and is having a horribile time, with time and keeping up,I mean horrible! He takes forever to get anything done,even at home. He is on Medication,even though all of his meds seem to stop working for a while...a whole nother story!
I had my first conference with his teacher after the third week of school, back in August,she said he is nearly the last one finished with his work,she could also tell that he did have adhd because he is still distracted. I asked her if these problems were "severe" she said "no" she really didn't make a big deal out of it.

Then on Sept 1st my Son had a doctors appointment and his teacher had faxed his rating scale to the doctor,I did not see it till we got to the appointment. The nurse and I went over the scale together (nurse see's him instead of Dr.lately??) and it was near perfect! She said other kids would kill to have a rating like that! I just feel like I am getting mixed messages here,my Son is coming home with only some of his homework written down because he says he did not have time, (its at the end of the day)and he also comes home with alot of extra stuff, because well you guessed it! TIME! I can see where she is coming from because he takes forever sometimes to do things, he has no concept of time I don't think! But I also see his side, he has a disability which affects getting things done in an orderly time.


Today his teacher wrote on his planner that he only got only 7 math problems done in 35 minutes that he must speed up in his work. Those were her exact words.She did not write down that he was talking or anything that would interfer,so I know that this has to do with his adhd,I see it at home. Plus he had a check by Excellent for his behaviour. She has also written other things in his planner in the past that refer to him not getting things done,or being too slow.I feel like replying to that note saying "tell a person they MUST read across the room with out glasses! I am so ticked right now,but am I over re-acting?


I know he knows how to do this math,I don't know if the medicine hadn't kicked in yet this morning or what,this work was done 1st thing this morning, and I had just switched over to another med Monday. I still however feel,that this teacher doesn't want, or feel like she needs to extend her self.

Another thing that ticks me off is on the 15th of September I talked to her on the phone, I had written her a note and she called me back,instead of writting back. Well I had asked her on the phone about what we could do at home with helping our Son with his reading comprehension.She said she would send these booklets/sheets home that would help that we could go over together. I also told her on the phone and in the letter I had written her, that this was a total shock to me, last year the teacher bragged about how good his reading was, he scored at a sixth grade level, also in other grades this wasn't mentioned. NOW I am being told that he has problems with his comprehension!


We have been working really hard with his reading at home,but it just irritates me that I haven't gotten any response. She staples notes to the pages in their planners,so I know it hasn't gotten lost,plus she told me briefly that she had recieved it. Report cards will be out soon,his reading comprehension was stated back during progress reports,which was around the time I had talked to her on the phone. All I want is some communication here,I shouldn't have to wait for a response this long and three notes,that have been spread out. It would be different if there wasn't a time limit,with due dates especially. I've always had other teachers respond much quicker than this and feel like they wanted to help.Am I asking too much? Honestly,I need some advice here! Am I over re-acting with this note and communication thing,and with his time problems? We are looking into (hopefully) getting accomadations for my Son. I am going to a support group tomorrow night to get some more info on 504's and IEP's.

Thanks for the long long vent! I hope I haven't scared anyone off!


TJ

[CJsMOM28]

Opps I meant "sorry" for the long long vent!
I'll try to keep it shorter next time!


TJ

[rosyred45]

Hi TJ, you must not have come across any of my vents if you are apologizing ;DYess, I'm that bad.

Anyhow, it sounds to me that the teacher is being wishy washy. Is that me or what

Tara, 4th grade no dx has been having a time with the responsibility factor, oh pray she makes it to 10. But she does fairly well with other things that require independant work.

MIKEY on the other hand is the other ball game.....you literally need to tell him what is this answer, write it down, go to the next problem.....pain in the a**. But that's just how he is.

LOOK INTO A 504. We have one for Mikey, not thaat it's done a whole heck of a lot from home, but in school, heck yeah. Mikey just got into the ELP program at school----see Enriched Learning Program post---ohh, I forgot to post there to tell the good news

Any how. One thing I will say, because I have seen it, don't let him deal the cards. Kids are slick, tehy will try to milk things for what they are worth. Believe me, my two have already tried it. PLUS all of the kids that I have worked with too.

Good luck, and don't worry about starting with a gripe.....I think I did WAYYYYYYYYYYYY back when too ;D

[MistyMorningPA]

I know just how you feel about the teacher! My daughter's in 4th grade too. The whole class has planners that they write down each subjects work for the day in. Then, as each item is completed, the teacher is to check it off. Anything not checked by the end of the day becomes homework. Ok, all well & good in theory.

The problem is, she keeps coming home with NOTHING checked! She swears the work was done & I believe her (its not hard to tell when she's lying) but then WHY ISN'T IT CHECKED?

The parent is to sign the book each night & I write notes all over it (i.e. "Why weren't these checked?" or " She says this was done in school.", etc.) But I get little or no feedback from the teacher.

I try to impress upon the teacher that its very important to be sure to check the items, but nothing's changed! So I'm never sure just how much work she has, I mean, come on, this is the innattentive child who ALWAYS forgets things!!

Oh, and another thing, she has a math LD, but when midterms came out last week, it was READING she's getting a D in!! She reads WAY above her age level! Teacher says its the written part thats bringing the grade down but it still makes no sense to me!

Ok, Sorry, I didn't mean to go on & on like that. Just once I got started I couldn't seem to stop!

[finnmom]

Hi TJ

Sorry you´re having such a hard time getting responce from the theacher. I think she´s in a kind of a denial She seem´s (to me) be thinking that there is really no problem , at least none that she couldn´t handle That´s the case sometime´s; theacher´s thinking that " I´am the theacher, I know how to theach these kid´s..."

sometime´s it feel´s like I have to write a list for the theacher, in a way as: tell him personally what to do next. Get him look at your eye´s when you talk to him, ask him if he got it down..... Seem´s hard to understand how our "absent-minded-professor"-kid´s to work sometime´s

You´re right, it´s about time to you to get a responce from her, keep a copy of everything you´ve send to her, and if she´s not responsing in a short while, then go to her personally and confront her wiht all of your note´s. It´s your right as a parent and her responsibility as an theacher. Good luck for you

[catseye]

My sd isnt as old, but it was strange at the end of last year sd was supposibly at a 6th grade reading level... (yeah right I didnt believe it for a second)... Beginning of this year, emerging first grade level? HUH? How can you lose 5 years in a summer! LOL (btw sd is in second grade)

It turned out sd had been reading the pictures with great accuracy, and memorizing the books the teacher had in the room... She fooled them, but not me, I knew that they were not accurate saying 6th grade reading...

Not surprising since no one knew sd was reading lips, as she cant hear very well...

Point is you know your son, trust your gut on this a bit... Good luck in your support group meeting tonight... Please relay any information we may need also regarding IEP's and 504's...

cat

[CJsMOM28]

Well I finally recieved a note from his teacher the next day the 7th, I would have posted sooner,but I have been sick in bed,so the stress of all of this didn't help. Better now though!

At the beginning of last week we studied and studied for this Math test that DS was having a hard time with and was to given Friday,she didn't even give it to the class,it will be given tomorrow. I am glad that he is prepared for it though.Also Sunday he did a book report that was said to be due,according to his planner, on Monday,yep you guessed it he didn't go over it till today. I think she just puts things off,notes and all. One night we stayed up soo late helping Ds with his homework and she didn't even take the assignment the next day,she told the class just to keep it in their folders even without checkig to see if they had done it,oh how aggravating! We WILL get through fourth grade,we WILL !


Rose red ~ Yes I have been one of those people who doesn't wont to gripe,be the "pet parent" but It's wearing me out! I can't take no more,no more miss nice mama,no more! I Learned so much at the meeting I went to last week about the 50 plan and IEP's. Report cards come out Thursday and our conference is next week,week from today as a matter of fact,then I will be handing in my request for an evaluation. Oh, I hope and pray he gets this 504! I do know that his grades have not been good this year so far, and he has ALWAYs been on the honor roll, since first grade when he was at his previous private school,and before meds.


Misty Morning, don't feel bad, I could on and on too! With this much aggravation, we need to vent, so your welcome to anytime with me! Yes this planner business is really irritating the crap out of my Husband and I, I can't wait till next week when we have our conference, I have sooo much to go over,a nd yet I'll probably walk out the door with someting I had forgotten!


Finnsmon~ You ought to see my filling cabinet,what a joke! Luckily I have been putting dates on evrything and coping what I have sent her and dating and coping,what she has sent me. I am going to Staples tomorow and buying one of those expandible files,in case I'll need it to take to school sometime,which I probably will! I really,really hate it when teachers (not all of them,there are some great ones!) expect ALL of their students to be on the same page, I mean no child is alike they all learn differently and in different ways My Sons second grade teacher was like that,the whole year I sounded like a broken record about "well my Son Is different" UGH


Catseye~ I am wondering if his teacher is putting too much into this reading issue,or the teachers in the past just didn't pick up on it? I had mentioned to his teacher how I thought it was strange that he had excellent scores on his EOG tests in reading and that last years teacher said how wonderful of a reader he was. I was saying it in a respectful way , I didn't want her to think I didn't trust what she was saying and that last years teacher was right and she wasn't ,but this is one of the reasons that I am gonna request for an evaluation. Her response was that the kids are not learning to read in fourth grade,they are reading to learn. And yeah,she could be right, I have noticed that lately when I ask DS about a book, or a few pages that he has been reading, that he doesn't remember parts of it. I did learn a good deal about 504 IEP's, I have to go now, but I will Be back later on and I will post more about what I had learned at that meeting.


TJ

[rosyred45]

Good luck and let us know if you need any help.

(((((((hugs)))))))))

[mom2tj]

TJ,

Feels funny to be caulling someone else that name! anyway my son forgets alot of what he reads when he reads out loud, I found out that last year kids where laughing if he made mistakes, the teacher didnt like and would put a stop to it but they still tryed they sneak a giggle and it makes him nervous.

this brings back memories, I remember as a child reading the next paragraph (in my head) just in case my name would be called next I did'nt pay attention to what the others where reading just practicing the next paragraphs, that is because I also got laughed at when I made mistakes it sticks to you.....

I dont want to scare you but I thought you might like to ask him since last year he was doing so well.