Why is it so hard to get our kids help sometimes?

[camismom]

I know some of you may be getting tired of my constant raves of late, but I've no where else to turn. Like my subject says, why is it so hard to get help sometimes?

Cami has been having trouble for MONTHS now with two girls at her school. One in particular that is really the bully and picks on Cami everyday. She calls her a name that Cami hates, and harasses her to the point of bullying. Cami herself tried to handle it to begin with by going to her teachers. Nothing was done. I then contacted the teachers. Nothing was done. Last week I contacted the Asst. Princ. about it, her response was to call Cami to her office to discuss it, then told Cami in the future when the girl does this to tell her to "Stop-it!" (duh, like she hadn't tried that already : and told her to start keeping a list of everytime this girl does something. That was last Monday. Cami is already on her second page of this list which proves this girl bothers her EVERYDAY, sometimes two or three times a day.

Last night she came home and told me the girl popped her in the head while walking down the hallway and calling her this name. She did it in class later and Cami told her (as instructed) to stop-it! Well, she got points for this (basically they have a points system that they use for discipline), yet the other girl got nothing. She got in trouble for defending herself as instructed but the girl got nothing for calling her a name. Excuse me?

Just in the past week I have read and heard about incidents at schools in our area and elsewhere that worry me. In a high school in the district I work for, a girl had her face slashed three times while fighting with another girl in the rest room. At another school with Cami's district, there was a boy who had his arm broken in a fight. I read on the internet yesterday that a 14 year old boy was found dead in a restroom at his middle school. Cami is not a big girl, and the girl that is harassing her is. Cami has taken to calling this girl names back, mouthing off at her, and trying to defend herself. I worry that one day this girl is going to corner her somewhere and then I'll be called that Cami was in a fight.

I contacted the Asst. Princ. a second time this morning telling them that this is the last time I ask for help from them. If they can't handle the problem in the school, then I'll go outside the school if needed.

Anyway, thanks for listening to me ramble....

Take care!

[ohmama]

Camismom,
You did the right thing to go to the assistant principal. To take it a legal step further I would suggest putting it in writing and to the direct attention of the principal. I would also mention in your letter that your daughter has a disability and there are agencys that would be very upset by her treatment in that school. Ask when the principal will be able to handle this situation personally as you are waiting for some action from him before you take it any further. Yes, it is a veiled threat. Maybe it will motivate some action and prevent further harm.

The danger to your child is very real as you have pointed out. Your daughter is being victimized and you should not take it lightly. Neither should the school.

[Madison]

Hi,
Yes...I think the teachers/princible can get alot done on that area. My boy was telling another boy in like 6th grade my boy is in 4th grade took ahold of my boys school paper and ripped it up! Well, when my child got to school and TOLD the teacher that teacher went FULL FORCE to the princible and called that 6th graders SCHOOL and that boy got detention and almost EXPELLED off the bus! He said 'Mom, I've NEVER had trouble with him since!" In fact all of this happened and I didn't know a THING about it! He was just talking about different events in school and happened to tell me about it.

Contact the princible and KEEP contacting them. Tell them your concerns and you don't want to see anybody getting hurt and you'll keep contacting them everytime your child has problems with this other student! They WON'T like dealing with all those phone calls and a parent that is upset. Believe you me....They'll try to get this under control!!

Take care....madison

[Linda]

Have you tried the area director or the school superintendent? Don't stop until you get someone to help you.You work for a school district right? Do what you have to do,because you know it will just continue.

Boy I hope there is a light at the end ot the tunnel for you..because I know it has been a long haul.

[swmom]

I would be furious at the school's lack of action on this.
Bullying is a serious, serious issue. If I were you, I'd show up at school and DEMAND to talk to the principal immediately.

[mom2tj]

I have the same problem with ds's and I tried the teachers and when that dint work I went directly to the principal I always wrote and kept a lettre to prove it... and I stated that I will not stop until it stops if this didnt work I am going to the school board..... so far so good the principal took care of it, I keep my fingers crossed.

[camismom]

I got a cal from the Asst. Princ. earlier. Apparently she has talked to Cami today, took her list, and has been talking to other students today "compiling info" to get "sometype disciplinary action" into place. She "assured" me that they will do something about it. I reminded her that I work fo a school district too and know the channels to take if necessary, that in light of the school face-slashing incident from last week at a local school, and the released info about the 14 year old murdered in Miami by another 14 year old while at school (did y'all hear about that?) that I was not going to let this go until something was done. She again assured me they would do something. Course that's what she said last week when I spoke with her and all she did in the end was tell Cami to tell the girl to stop when she bothered her and to keep a record of it. We'll see, but I assure you, I won't let it go...

[Linda]

GOOD FOR YOU!!!

[swmom]

Good luck. Eager to know the outcome!

[LitlBaa]

Katie had a similar problem, going back to sixth grade and continuing at junior high. I finally told Katie she needed to stand up for herself and then go tell the principal. So, when the girl called Katie a b@#*&, Katie called her "Trailer Trash". When the principal called me, I laughed. Then I pointed out that this was an ongoing harassment issue, and if they couldn't handle it, my next step would be a school board meeting.

The other girl was transferred a week later.