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Post by finnmom on May 18, 2005 10:04:49 GMT -5
Too fast, too impulsive, low selfesteem...... I think those are big reason´s for the problem´s... Kbugsmom, I´am so sorry for you. I know that has happend to most of us....  I dont know what to say.... some activitie´s where she can meet friend´s in controlled environment, mayby... |
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Post by kstquilter on May 18, 2005 13:28:53 GMT -5
christy,
i think alot of that stuff is normal teenage stuff and especially girl stuff.
i also think our kids do tend to get over some things faster but i know brittany is hurt by it.
she was a member of a dance company from 3rd grade to 11th grade, the same one. there were so many times i watched kids not even want to sit next to her or they didn't invite her to parties or even just go get something to eat in between classes. that doesn't include school situations.
brittany is a loyal friend until she's been hurt too many times and then she's done. we're going thru some of it again because all of her high school friends went away to school. they will be juniors in the fall, have been away from home for two years and have changed and have new friends.
she is starting to find some friends at our community college, only since being away from the ex-boyfriend. but none of stuck around long.
i wish i could offer more advice christy, but i think alot of what cami's going thru is typical of all teenage girls.
karen
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Post by camismom on May 18, 2005 14:34:50 GMT -5
i wish i could offer more advice christy, but i think alot of what cami's going thru is typical of all teenage girls. Oh, I agree. It was the same for me at her age. For me it was due to being so danged poor though. We didn't have the money for me to be able to take lessons in different things so I was always jealous of the girls that did. I would think "if I could have taken gymnastics lessons I could be a cheerleader too." Stuff like that. Then of course the cliquey girls would have the "in style" clothes and I wouldn't. Other than being in the same classes and clubs due to good grades, I just didn't fit in. Cami has the advantage of the money I didn't have but because of the ADHD she doesn't have the other. She can't focus on things long enough I guess to become "good" at it and so has yet to find her niche. She wants to belong to something and have that sense of belonging when she enters high school. Though I tell her there is nothing wrong with it, she wants to be more than just another student doing nothing more than taking classes in school. She wants to be a cheerleader or the star of the school play or a member of one of the sports teams or something. To her this equals popularity. I just keep hoping she can find her way. Chorus was my thing in school.... it was what I was good at, what I excelled in, got awards for, and where I "stood out". Maybe that can be her thing. We'll see. As far as Brittany, I wouldn't worry too much. She will find friends as she continues to grow.... just try to stay as close to her as she'll let you and be her friend as well. I always tell Cami that it is better to have one good friend than ten fair weather ones. |
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Post by Kbugsmom on May 23, 2005 13:06:37 GMT -5
Hi again. I contacted our ped. and she suggested we try backing down the dose again and if that doesn't do it, then we'll switch. So we are still doing Adderall. She is only on 10 mg, but it does seem to be working for her and she is definitely less volatile, though it seems like the coming-down period at the end of the day is an inevitable occurrence at any dose. After our initial consultation with the psychologist at the time of dd's adhd/auditory proc. delay diagnosis, we were told that dd was gifted in certain areas of learning and that she is extremely intelligent. The very apparent down side to this is that she is extremely aware of the differences in her abilities to process information and knows that she's just not 'getting it' like the other kids do. She is very defensive and sensitive to the least little infraction, things that other kids just blow off. This and other missed cues have done nothing to help her socially or help her self-esteem. Boy, I can't wait for the teenage years!  I guess it's time for me to become more involved in setting up playdates for her. As Christy mentioned, I do think there is a lot to be said for helping our kids find their 'thing'. Dd's thing is most definitely her artistic ability so maybe it's time to start getting more involved with that. Again, thanks for your support and encouragement. I am glad that we are not alone, although I wish that none of us had to deal with this. |
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Post by kstquilter on May 23, 2005 17:35:06 GMT -5
i have to agree about helping your child find their niche. we were lucky on one hand that brittany found hers at 5. however it was an expensive niche (competetive dancing) and it still didn't help her with friends. i think it helped her self-esteem quite a bit, kept her on track with homework better because she only had X amount of time to do it in.
alot of our kids are gifted and very intelligent. brittany is probably borderline gifted but very intelligent. it can also be a bad thing because it's easier for them to outsmart you at times!
good luck with the medication adjustment and hope it all works out for you.
karen
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