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Post by mom2tj on Nov 28, 2003 10:06:05 GMT -5
I dont know what to do..... DS's class (3rd grade) is going on an overnight field trip, my 1st reaction was NO WAY ds is way to immature, he came home the 1st day and said no he doesnt want to go but yesterday they showed the kids a video about it and now he wants to go.... He is scared of the dark and very sracred of thunder he still occationaly has accidents in bed he ends up in our bed at night and just yesterday I went out for diner with firends so DH put him to bed and from what I hear DH had a hard time... I havent sopken do DH yet (I came home late) I just feel I am setting up for disaster if I let him go.... its a 2hour drive to where he is going and the teacher said there are no phones to call home(except for emergency) I dont know. If it where up to me I'd say no no no but DS is begging  he tell me I treat him like a baby....I fell like the bad mom. DH says to let him go I just feel like if someting goes wrong I will hate myself forever if he starts crying of worse (God forbid he pees in bed) he will be the target for teasing for the rest of his elementary years..... Am I a paranoid over protective mom or what.... would you let your child go in these circumstances |
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Post by sierra on Nov 28, 2003 14:05:09 GMT -5
Any chance you can go with him? I have a friend who has it written up in the 504 plan that one of his parents will be one of the chaperones at all field trips. Not just overnighters.
Even if you don't have it documented this time the teacher might be glad of another chaperone if there's room. If there's not room then bring a sleeping bag.
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Post by Dad2Brooke on Nov 28, 2003 14:23:38 GMT -5
Good idea Sierra  mom2tj, what a tough call.  You want to let him go, but if something happens you're afraid of him being embarassed and his self esteem taking a hit. Is there an alternative, maybe something really cool you could do as a family the same night? If I had to make the choice, I think I would go with having him stay home, just because of all the what ifs. (and I would really hate myself for that decision.) Third grade seems awful young for an overnight field trip. We didn't go on an overnight field trip until our Senior class trip. |
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Kymn
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Post by Kymn on Nov 28, 2003 14:39:02 GMT -5
I agree with sierra see if you can go as a chaperone or even your hubby if you arent able to otherwise I dont think I would allow my son to go on an overnight field trip in grade 3 even if he wasnt ADHD and had all the quirks he does.It seems to young to me
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Post by mom2tj on Nov 28, 2003 17:30:10 GMT -5
no parents allowed  I'm still thinking about it I havent made up my mind yet..... he is still begging me....  |
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Kymn
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Post by Kymn on Nov 28, 2003 18:51:49 GMT -5
no parents huh.well that does poes a problem doesnt it.Where are they going that they dont allow parent chaparones?Seems strange and crazy if I was a teacher man I would be begging for help  all those kids and just me yikes.WEll good luck making your decision I guess ask yourself what are you most scared of in letting him go and then answer yourself and if you can live with the worst case scenerio and see that life will go on and both you and your son will survive it and learn from it,if the worse case senerio happens then I would say let him go I think lol.Sorry not a lot of help but do ask yourself that question.Bye for now Kymn |
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Post by sierra on Nov 28, 2003 23:01:02 GMT -5
How many kids are going? And who besides the teacher is chaperoning?
This field trip is sounding way less attractive IMHO.
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Post by vickilyn32 on Nov 28, 2003 23:27:13 GMT -5
Has your son been able to stay overnite at friends houses yet? If he has, then this trip should not be a problem. If not, maybe he could do a trial overnite with a buddy and see if it works. My DD went to girlscout camp the summer after 2nd grade for 4 days 3 nights. She started staying over at friends houses only 2 months before camp, but had a great time at camp. I was the one who sat at home biting my fingers. She did not even want to come home when I picked her up she was having too much fun. She has been back every year since. As far as wetting the bed, how about getting him some of those goodnites. My DS wore them for quite a while everytime he would get sick. It seemed that if he was not feeling good, he could not tell if he had to go untill too late. If he wore them noone would know. The kids would probably get changed in a bathroom, and if not, he still could. Just give him a sealable plastic bag to put the used goodnite in and then hide it in the garbage pail.
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Post by LitlBaa on Nov 29, 2003 2:17:24 GMT -5
I was worried about Katie's sixth grade trip for two nights, but DH was able to go as a parent chaperone. No parents allowed doesn't sound like a good thing to me. One of my concerns about the trip was the medication issue, I knew she wouldn't go to the nurse by herself, so it wouldn't get taken, then she'd be off the wall, then no one would deal with her...well, you all know the routine.
Seems to me that there's a major liability issue if it's just the teacher and a class of kids overnight somewhere. Where are they sleeping? Will they be unsupervised then?
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Post by Angelia on Nov 29, 2003 21:18:41 GMT -5
This is a tough one! I would try and ask him if he wanted to do something else really fun like dad2brooke suggested. I would see if maybe he wanted to go skating or a movie or something that he really enjoys and would put plenty of hype to it and see if he would be alright with that instead. Maybe that way he wouldn't feel left out, and then you wouldn't feel like you let him down.
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Post by AnneM on Nov 30, 2003 12:11:35 GMT -5
Oh this is difficult!! .... My son went away for a school trip when he was 9 (which I think is older than your son!) - it was for 5 days - and apparently every single day many times he was in tears and BEGGING the teacher that he should be allowed to go home NOW! .... and he has never, ever, ever been away overnight on a school trip since!! He has refused on EVERY occasion!! (Even in High School!!) .... It seemed to "put him off" forever!!
Anyway!! Sorry!! That wasn't a very "positive" response!! I know there are other kids who go away on ALL the school/overnight trips and LOVE it!! ... so they are all individual!
However, on the peeing in the bed bit ..... this was ALWAYS an issue with my son when he was younger ... even at aged 9.... but we had a meeting for the parents etc. before the trip and it was pointed out to us that accidents in the bed were FAR MORE COMMON than any of us probably thought and if this was likely to happen we should let them know and also let the child know what to do. We were assured a plastic sheet would be subtly put on our child's bed.... The "what to do" was to go and quietly "mention" it to a certain teacher in the morning ... the teacher would then quietly arrange to have the bed changed ... nobody (apart from my son and the teacher) needed to know anything else....
It worked ... He was away for 5 nights and he (apparently) wet the bed once .... it was 'quietly' fixed and no humiliation was bestowed upon him! Nobody else knew anything about it. So you do need to check what the procedure should be if this WERE to happen (hopefully it won't!) ...
I really do sympathise because this is such a toughie!!
Let us know whether he goes or not!
GOOD LUCK !! Anne
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Jenn
Full Member
Hey all just let me know you are from ADHD site :)
Posts: 121
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Post by Jenn on Dec 1, 2003 11:07:32 GMT -5
I would be troubled to since there are no parents allowed. But if there are going to be enough ppl like others from the school you could get a pack of the overnights for kids kids up to 80 or 90 pounds. They are real thin and he could sneak them in the bathroom under his pj's.
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Post by mom2tj on Dec 2, 2003 10:29:57 GMT -5
The dead line was yesterday... I sent a note to the teacher that I still had concerns and asked if it wasnt to late to please call me and she didnt call so I can asume its to late  there was only 90 spaces for 120 students, grade 3 & 4 are invited.... I guess its full .... I guess he will not go..... he is upset but I promised his the moon... the field trip is in june, I just hope they dont spend the next 6 months talking about it. |
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Post by BBW4EVR1 on Dec 20, 2003 19:39:16 GMT -5
I think 3rd grade is waaaaay to young for a school sponsored overnight field trip. You are correct not to let him go. Saying no is never easy--especially with our children whom we want to be included in as many "normal" activities as possible. Truth is, you are better off "suffering" the rath of the next six months than suffering from the results of this trip if any of your "what if" concerns happened. Our son has been to camp two summers. He spent 2 weeks (yep-2 weeks) at a place called Camp Courage where ALL of the children either had Epilepsy and/or ADHD/ADD. There are many specialized camps across the country where your son would be tended to just as if he were at home. Camp Courage has RN's and doctors on duty around the clock. Meds are dispensed just as if the child were at home. The activities are geared to the "abilities" of the campers. Our son and many others in his cabin had to wear pull-ups at night and NOBODY made fun of anybody 'cuz for a few weeks, he was in a place where everyone was like him. He loved it! He has been 2 summers now. It is good for our son to have a break from his over-protective parents and it is good for DH and me to have a break from our son. The camp is about 3 hours from where we live. We are not allowed to talk to our son-but his camp counselor calls with daily reports. It is awesome! OK-got off of the subject there. Anyway, I believe you will not regret not sending your son on this overnighter. The what if's far outweigh the benefits!  |
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