How you were brought up...

[camismom]

Aimee, much {{{{{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} for you. Thank you for sharing. I know that had to be tough, but we all know you are a better person for it. Sounds like you and cat overcame quite a bit as well. My praise to you both!

[finnmom]

Aimee

Thank´s for sharing your story, it only show´s how well a strong individual can grow up to a good, steady adult, no matter what. You made it through that, you can make what ever you want

Catseye
Thank you for you too. I admire people who can overcome something like this, really achieve something

Congratulations both!(((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))

Like our adhd:ers, they have to work hard and achieve almost everythign, I hope it make´s them stronger, more caring person´s

Marja

P.s Kaiti, we have no snow anymore ;D It´s spring, YI-HAAAAA ;D But on winter, then it´s all downhill ;D ;D ;D(so to speak )

[BBW4EVR1]

My mother is a very strong individual (imagine that!) My parents divorced after 35 years of marriage when I was 15. Anyway, my mother's dream for all of her children was that they should be more prosperous than her. But in her quest to help her children (all 8 of us) succeed and "do better" than she, she also told us that while we (her children) strive to give our children things we did not have, we shouldn't forget to give them the things that we did have. Very sound advice from a very "sound" woman.

Footnote: for those whose relatives sit in church on Sunday after blasting others all week and making racial remarks and swearing and using foul language, I, personally, think that there is no better place for them on Sunday than church!

[rosyred45]

VERY NICE FOOT NOTE

I agree with your mom BBW...make sure that you give the kids the fundimentals of love and joy. The more I sit and think, the more I appreciate everything that my mom did.

She lost her mother when she was 19 and had to hold off on college to take care of the rest of her family. My aunt, Her youngest sister was only 4 months old at the time, then there were 3 others. My proudest moment came in 1995 when she graduated from College. She went back to college in about 1985 or so and just took a few courses here and there. But it paid off and she is a teacher. d**n Good one too. I always liked having her for a substitute, she could explain things better than the regular teacher could half the time.

I got some big shoes to fill, but I like running around barefoot, so I might not fill them just they way they wanted ;D

[Honeysmom]

I also grew up in town, sort of a medium sized area. My parents were extremely strict, and what others thought was something they worried about more than anything. There are 3 kids in my family, I am the oldest.

All three of us were brought up diferently. My mom stayed home with all of us. We had one car and my mom always told us we were poor, but I don't think we were. I went to a Cathloic grade school and it was really hard for my parents to send us there. It actually was harder for them to send us there than it is to send my brother to a private college.

My parents were young (18 and 19) when they had me. My dad worked his tail off to support us and always wanted more. I guess I was raised in a blue-collar family and by the time my younger brother was old enough to realize it they were a white collar family. Now both of my parents have great jobs, a nice house, and everything else that goes with it. That sort of makes me the odd-man-out b/c the rest of the family is "white-collar" people and I am not. I married a farmer, imagine the shock of that one to my mom and dad!!

I guess I am a lot like the boy from Christy's church. We were not a real close family, I always felt like we went to church so it looked good, and I never felt like I measured up. And it definately HAS made me a better parent. I make sure to give my kids extra of the things that I always felt were not there for me, acceptance, support, and understanding. I do not disicpline my kids by hurting their feelings as I was.

So yes, I am the family hick! I drive an old car, we go barefoot all summer, go fishing almost every night, and we have a lot of fun together. So my parents taught me tons!

Becky

[camismom]

bbw - I agree with that footnote. I always look at church as a hospital for our souls!

I'm glad I started this post - I'm learning lots more about my "friends"!

[Honeysmom]

Amiee, I am very impressed at all that you have overcome in your life. That is a lot to deal with and I think most people would not be able to deal with it as well as you have. Good for you.

I also agree with the foot note.

Becky

[lllex]

Hi all,

I really enjoyed hearing all of your stories. Here's mine:

I grew up financially poor. But I was pretty oblivious to it. We had the surplus foods (boxes of canned food), free lunches at school, hand me down clothes, but that wasn't enough to tip me off that we were poor ;D. I found out we were poor in grade school when my teacher told us what the poverty line was, well I knew what my mother made and we were under that line, I was floored .

But even so, it was a fine childhood, I had love, support, patience, friends, and somehow my mother managed to scrape together enough for a glut of Christmas presents, and it was enough. We didn't have a car, new clothes, ymca classes, an allowance. We lived in a tiny, filthy 3 bedroom apartment, with birds, fish, hamsters, cats and dogs .

My dad was an abusive alcoholic, but thankfully my mother divorced him by the time I was 1, so I didn't have to experience that. I only saw him a couple times a year, so he was virtually a stranger. I still don't see him to much - he remarried when I was a kid and had another daughter with her. He's mellowed a lot over the years, I enjoy his company now - although not when his wife is around, for some reason he's really pleasant to me an my husband, but is really verbally abusive to his wife . I imagine I would be totally different person if I had to witness my mother taking verbal and physical abuse on a regular basis.

My mother has never remarried, but she did live with a verbally abusive man for a couple of years, when I was 15 - 16. This man hit on me when I was fifteen - and when they broke up he ended up living with my 18 year old sister, I know sounds like a soap opera . She finally wised up about 18 years later and dumped him . I think watching my mother work so hard to raise the four of us without any help for so many years made me realize how strong women can be. And seeing her take that kind of crap from some guy made me determined not to make that mistake!

And so here I am, married to the most wonderful considerate, generous man in the world (at least I think so ), with 3 sweet beautiful children! Life is good.

Laura

[finnmom]

BBW I, too, liked your footnote, so true!!!

I read your story´s with great interest, they are so thouching

I wanted to add something that has made a great impact on my life, who I am. My dad was 35 yr when I was born. He lost his father when he was 7, in an road accident. He was raised by a mom, whom I never knew, a though cookie, is what I´ve heard ;D She did great job raising 4 kid´s alone.

When my dad was 4, Finland got in a war with Russia, it took more than 5 yr to get rid of it, my dad lost his older brother and other brother was wounded badly, he´s still with us, wonderfull man Between 1939-1945 in that war, lot´s of families in my home village lost all their men , I can only imagine how hard that has been. My dad and his sibling´s are really admirable person´s, they seem to get of the bitternes and hatery what could have become of that. I love them and try to make them proud of me, in a way I know that they already are

My life has been so much easier than many of your´s, my dad´s an other´s, if only I would remember to be thankfull of that!

Marja

[jdmom]

Wow - this is interesting!

I grew up a country girl. Lived in a small community that actually boasted 1 gas station and a lot of churches and nothing else. You had to drive on 7 miles of dirt road to get to my house. I didn't realize it then, but we were pretty well off. My dad worked for the railroad, so he was gone a lot, but the time he spent at home was ALWAYS with us. Mom was a stay-at-home mom. I spent my time making forts out of hay bales in the barn, climbing trees, having persimmon fights, and swimming in the creek. The only neighbors within walking distance was a family with 3 boys, the youngest being 2 years older than me. So I grew up to be a tomboy and learned to be tough and stick up for myself at a young age. When I was about 14, Dad decided he needed to move us into town. Town to dad was still on a dirt road, but right on the outskirts of town, and only 6 houses away from the pavement. We actually had neighbors we could see! Then Daddy hurt his back and couldn't work anymore. That's when I figured out how good I'd had it before. We used to take family vacations every year. I used to be able to wear designer clothes. All that changed. It was a big adjustment for us all. Mom and Dad almost got divorced. Money was so much tighter, which caused stress in their marriage, Dad felt "useless" after being the provider for so many years and became depressed. Also, they had to adjust to being around each other 24/7, which they were not used to after all the years of his travelling. But we all survived and so did their marriage. The lesson I learned was to appreciate what you have. And to enjoy life while it's good, because you never know when circumstances may change.

[aimee30]

After reading over my last post, I decided it sounded pretty rotten. Yest my teen years were pretty bad, but I do want you all to know that the early years were wonderful.

We were constantly doing things with mom. We might not have had much money, but we stayed busy. We spent countless hours at the library, swimming in the river, riding bikes, playing kick the can and ghost in the graveyard, looking for geodes, hiking, you name it, if it didn't cost money, we did it. We occasionally had money a little money, but it was the free stuff that I remember most.

I'm also glad that I went through the things I did as a teenager. I do believe that they have made me a better person. Sometimes a little crazy though. Thank you all for your kind words.

I too have enjoyed reading about everyone's families and look forward to reading more.

[Amsmom]

Wow, so many senstive, thoughtful posts. Thanks to all for sharing with us. I admire you all.

I am the middle child of 5. The middle child is a difficult position (aren't they all). I was too young for my 2 older sisters and too old for my younger sister and brother. That is where I began my lifelong role as the peacemaker. Not always sure that I like the role, as it can be exhausting, but it's instinctive to me.

[rosyred45]

;D ;D ;D ;D ;DAnd so begind the life of a Moderator at the ADHD boards ;D ;D ;D ;D

I'll get a little deeper in a while, just got back from Tara's spring concert. They played Heigh Ho and Supercalifrgilisticexpalidous.....

I hope I spelled that right
Kaiti

[Amsmom]

rosyred45 said:

;D ;D ;D ;D ;DAnd so begind the life of a Moderator at the ADHD boards ;D ;D ;D ;D

LOL!!!!!!!!!