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Post by Honeysmom on Mar 29, 2004 11:56:12 GMT -5
Honey will be 5 in about 2 weeks. He asked if he could have a party, and I think it would be a nice idea. I am probably insane, but I have never had one before so I need some advice.
First off, I think we should just invite the boys from school. He only wants to invite one girl, but I feel as though if I invite one girl, I should include them all so no one feels left out. That would be 21 kids! I know I can't handle that with DH and I alone. If we ask only the boys that would be 8 kids. Does that seem right, or approiate?
Next, I don't know any of the other parents, and they do not know me. We have only lived in this town for about 9 or 10 months. I would like to put on the invitation that if either the child, or the parent would feel more comfortable the parents are welcome to stay. I wouldn't expect them to just drop their kids off here and assume that we are nice people, since I don't think I would want them to do that to us. Does that sound OK?
Now the fun stuff...How long should a party for a 5 y/o go? I though maybe 2 hours? Like 1-3 on a Saturday. Is that long enough? Maybe 12-3 would be better?
And what do we do? I thought maybe play a few games, outside if the weather permits. Like, pin the tail on the donkey, or dropping clothes pins into the jar. But those are the only games I know. So suggestions would be helpful. Then I though that we could have some cake and snacks, and then just let the kids play or if it is bad weather, maybe rent a cartoon, like Arthur, and let them play in the house.
My last problem is presents. I don't want anyone to feel like we are having a party to get gifts. As a parent I want to put on the invitations, no gifts please, but is that OK? I guess I since we have never had a birthday party, and Honey has only been to one where they didn't give gifts he won't expect them anyway? But then I wonder if he does and maybe I am just not being fun. I don't know?!?!?!?
I am going to make these decisions based on what you guys tell me, so please be honest. This party is a first for us and I really want it to go well.
Thanks so much...Becky
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Post by camismom on Mar 29, 2004 13:06:23 GMT -5
One of the best birthday parties Cami has ever had we had at home in our garage. Two-three hours is plenty of time. What I did was games, followed by cake and ice-cream, opening of presents, then just some free play until parents picked them up. If you choose to not do presents, I don't see a problem with that. Or, you could just put something like "presents optional. Your child's PRESENCE will be PRESENT enough.  " Also, noting that a parent is free to stay with their child is fine too. As far as games, you got the ol' stand by's pin the tail on the donkey, or pin the nose on the clown, and the clothespin game you mentioned. Two that I did was "Go Fishing" like they have at carnivals, and musical "chairs." I got some duct tape and made a big circle with pieces of duct tape and wrote numbers on them. I then placed the children on the tape pieces and played the music telling them to stop when the music stopped. We drew a number from a bucket and whoever was standing on that number won a prize. For the fishing game you can tie a piece of string to the end of a long stick and add a clothespin for the pole. For prizes on this game and the fishing game I just went to our local dollar store and bought a few things. I also had a kareoke machine on hand for them to do. Some played on Cami's swingsets while others jumped rope, tossed a ball around, etc. All this is weather permitting of course. As far as the number of guests, you don't want Honey to be too overwhelmed, but keep in mind, the more you invite, the more may come. If you invite all 21, the chances of all 21 actually coming are slim. It's all a matter of what you can handle. Put on the invites to please r.s.v.p. by a certain date and that way you'll know how many to expect ahead of time. Good luck, and have fun! |
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Post by rosyred45 on Mar 29, 2004 13:34:38 GMT -5
I haven't had a friends party, but I can tell you what I would advise against-crafts..... I took Mikey to a party last year. It was in a pole barn, lots of room for 2 long tables and the rest of the STUFF that the people had. Mind you it was organized STUFF, but it was a fire hazard waiting to happen. They had a jet blower for heat that one of the moms had to keep her little one away from, over and over and..... The mom thought it was neat to have the kids make a project. Well, I grew up with the mom and knew her, but glad I didn't send my husband because he would have left. Picture 40 kids+parents of 40 kids trying to make this thing with only a few glue tubes. HMMMMM not working very well with 5 yr olds that have no patience or wait you turn skills. By the time all was said and done, Mikey was going bonkers because all of the other parents let thier kids run around like little wild bancheeeessss.  You know like McDonalds' playground w/out the equipment. I was the big mean witch that didn't let him have icing and candy. I would just invite the boys if I were you. It's a policy in a couple of classes that if you send invites through this class, if all are not invited, boys are to invite ALL of the boys and girls are to invite ALL of the girls. Which seems fair until you realize she's making your guest list for you. ABOVE ALL:::::::::MAKE SURE ANY FOOD ALLERGIES OR REACTIONS ARE MAKE KNOWN TO YOU. This mom was a blessing and got pineapple juice for Mikey and wiped the icing off Mikey's cake. Have fun. If I think of anything else my next novel will be shorter ;D Kaiti |
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Post by AnneM on Mar 29, 2004 14:03:29 GMT -5
Oh Becky lots of good luck with your party !! ... Wow ... the parties we had over the years for my son ... One thing I will absolutely guarantee you ... they are EXHAUSTING!! ...
Before answering your questions more specifically you have to put up with me reminiscing for a minute! ... My son had (looking back over many years) a wide variety of parties ... started at home when younger and then we hired out the hall at the local sports centre with entertainment "thrown in" for the whole class (much easier to have it away from home with everything done for you by the way ;D!!) ... and as he got to around 10-11 we had "outings"to theme parks instead with just 3-4 friends ....
But I have to tell you about ONE particular year when he was around 6 and we hired a mini-bus and took 10 boys to a big indoor playarea a few miles away. We parked at a multi-stoey. On leaving dh went to get the minibus whilst I stood with the 10 boys outside the play area. The road was soooo busy and I was keeping them well back (but it was terrifying - they were ALL so excited!) ... I expected dh to be about 5 minutes ... well we waited there for nearly ONE HOUR !! ... What had happened was that although dh had got the minibus UP the multistorey quite happily he was unable to come DOWN it (with the low ceilings) without either scraping off the top of the minibus OR letting out the tyres. He opted for the latter and this of course took ages.. ... meantime I had 10 VERY excitable children very near a busy road !! ... Oh the memory!! ... The next thing was that on the way home (we lived in london) there was a Rod Stewart concert going on at Wembley Stadium and it took us nearly 2 hours to get home !! It was unbelievable ... the parents were all waiting ... I HAD managed to get a message to one of them to tell eveyone we were going to be late ... but ... but ... !! ... Still everyone got back in ONE PIECE and I was pretty pleased to hand those kids over to their mums and dads ;D
Anyway ... that is just one occasion I still shudder about ... all the other parties were a lot of fun! ... ;D
I also think it is a really NICE idea to let the parents know they are welcome to stay if they wish ... this should make them feel well at ease and can make their own decision ... and I love Camismom's idea about the presents!! ;D
I always found that if you invite 20 kids ... around 16 will be able to make it ... same thing if you invite 10 kids ... around 8 will make it ... etc..... so I would also suggest you invite a little more than your ideal figure ...
Oh ! ... and if Honey just wants one girl to come I don't see anything wrong with that either ... I remember Sam going to one girl's party when he was much younger and it turned out he was the only boy she had asked ... & it didn't bother him at all ... (in fact I think he was rather flattered!) ;D
I wish you lots of luck and FUN with Honey's party !! ... Please keep us posted!
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Post by finnmom on Mar 29, 2004 15:22:50 GMT -5
Honeysmom Although I havent have any kid´s bd-party´s, I´ll through my opinion in here ;D I´ve seen that 4-5 is closest to the ideal number of kid´s at party´s, more you get, more trouble you´ll have  Fishing came in to my mind too, kid´love it, just make sure you have enough little price´s for them. Have a good time ;D I´ll be praying for you when this happend´s Marja |
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Post by Honeysmom on Mar 29, 2004 15:52:15 GMT -5
After thinking about this, and convincing Honey, we are going to stick with just the boys. I wouldn't mind if the girls came, but that is just too many kids, and I really think if I invite one I have to invite them all. If I go only with the boys, then we'll invite 10, and probably 8 or so will actually come. Plus, he only wants the one girl to come, not the rest. If he were older, and had a set group of friends, we'd invite people differntly, but since he is so little your best friend one day isn't the next. I have a real fear of leaving kids out. I used to be the kid left out so now I can't bring myself to do it. I really like Camismom's idea about the present also, it is worded well and leaves it up to them. And Kaiti, never, ever, in a million years are we doing a craft! I have a hard enough time containing it when my kids do them here alone. I might be a little "off" sometimes, but I am not a total nut!! Anne, your story made me laugh! I would've been in a panic by a busy road with all those kids. Thank goodness we have a fence! Becky |
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Post by rosyred45 on Mar 29, 2004 16:35:56 GMT -5
I don't know what in the world the mother was thinking. Some of the parents were helping other kids while some were chit chatting. I think it was a total mess.
They did have a pinta, oh, I can't spell it. You know those things the kids swing at and all of the candy and goodies fall out. She let each of the kids take a turn at breaking it, and the last one to go was Mikey, and guess who broke it ;D He wasn't too thrilled when I had to take the candy from him, but he's still here today, so that didn't kill him.
Just watch out for the boys "pretending"to be ninjas and fighting and stuff.
Here's to a brave woman...
Kaiti
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Post by tridlette on Mar 29, 2004 16:38:59 GMT -5
I remember when the boys were young reading that one child for every year of age... so since Honey is 5, 5 is a good number of friends to invite.
I highly recommend having it somewhere else... so you don't need to clean the house twice. If you do choose to have it at home, don't get too carried away about cleaning before hand.
Most Mom's of 5 yr. olds will stay, and help! So again, the limitted number is a good idea.
As for the gifts... the BEST party I ever had for my guys (they all went to the same home based day care and their birthday's are within a week of each other) was a BOOK party. I simply requested that the gifts be limitted to books! One mom went a little bit over and bought $20 of books per kid, another bought coloring books and crayons for each. But after all was done, we had 49 new books in the house, and only one was a duplicate!
Over the years we have done bowling parties, a Chuck E. Cheese party, indoor mini. golf (although I know that noses can get broken doing that!) and the McDonald's playland party.
Pizza delivery is usually a safe food choice... remember that hot dogs have a lot of preservatives, PB & J can cause allergies... or you can plan it from 2:30 to 4:00 and most parents won't expect the children to be fed anything but juice and cake. Also, remember food coloring can cause some kids problems! Definitely find out if any kids have a problem with anything specific.
Planning goodie bags is another challenge. Don't put anything in a baggie you wouldn't want Avery to get hold of. I like McDonald's gift certificates... kids love them too! LEGO sampler's can be fun too! Oh, and of course, books!
I think an hour and a half is fine for time, they always overstay the welcome anyway, and if you let them think it is two or three hours, they will stay for 4 or 5! Shaun went to a sleep over two weeks ago... it was scheduled from 7 p.m. till 3 p.m. He went over at 4 in the afternoon and came home at 5 the next night~ he even called Patrick to come over for cake and ice cream! Kids get pretty daring as they get older!
Think small this year, because it sets the expectations for the future. If you go too crazy this year, then both the kids will expect great things every year.
As for games go, don't plan too much. At that age they would rather just play spontaneous stuff than organized games!
One game that I learned a long time ago is...
Bowling using the single serving size cereal boxes for pins and a playground type ball. If the kid knocks over a box, they get to keep it. You give each of them a 2 or 3 turns and they will have some decent loot to take home. Just replace any boxes that are knocked over before the next kid bowls.
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Post by AustinsMom on Mar 29, 2004 17:50:59 GMT -5
I agree that smaller is better at that age. When my daughter was about that age we got some large boxes and cut holes in them in different place, hung streams of crepe paper over some of the openings, made "trap doors" in them. We included a little tykes slide in the mix and some bean bags and balls and the kids had a blast. It was cheap, and just took some energy to get the refrigerator boxes and things set up.
Another thought--cupcakes instead of a large cake are so much easier. We would stack them up to make a "cake". And I think 2 hours is plenty of time at that age. My theory is "leave them wanting more...". That will help insure it is a success for your little one, and doesn't give time for him to get overstimulated. Have fun!
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Post by jdmom on Mar 30, 2004 14:57:07 GMT -5
I think you are a brave woman! The thought of a bunch of 5 year olds running wild in my house makes me nauseated. I have always made Jarrett have his parties somewhere else. We've done the bowling alley, Chuck-E-Cheese (WAY too expensive) and one of those big indoor play centers at the local gymnastics center. The best had to be the indoor play center. Relatively inexpensive, and they ran and climbed until they were exhausted, which was perfect! I think pizza is a great idea, but in my experience, they aren't interested in the food anyway. And at the time you are having it, you will not be expected to feed them. I would just stick with cake and punch. This year Jarrett asked for one of those monster cookie things instead of a cake, and that went over quite well. I always plan on about only half the kids showing up. Are you only inviting kids from the class or are you inviting family, too? I always make sure that there are a couple of cousins there, just in case no one shows up. I haven't had that happen to me, but once Jarrett and I went to a party where he was the only kid that showed up! The little boy was heartbroken! I have always liked the musical chairs! And a pinata is LOTS of fun, as long as you supervise VERY closely, broken noses again. I liked Camismom's way of addressing the present issue, if that's what you want to do. Just be careful of Honey's reaction. You would hate for him to blurt out "But, where's my presents?!" Truth be told, they will all probably bring presents anyway, because the won't want to be the only person there who didn't bring one. Good luck! |
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Post by mom2tj on Mar 30, 2004 15:15:14 GMT -5
I am an expert in parties... I am always asked to plan parties for my nieces and friends kids....
2 hours in you dont intend to give a meal 3 if you do.... and for 5yo 8 is plenty... the rule of thumb is omount of kids per age... example 5yo 5 kids... expect some to decline....
a pignata is a great idea for this age groupe get one that you pull on the string not the one you hit incase weather doent permit put names in a bag and star with honey and lett him pick a name and so on... keep extra candies for thoese how dont get much....
a scavinger hunt is great for boys hid small things like plastic bugs marble noodle pennie anything you can find if you have a digital camera take a picture of them all together and they have to find as much as possible...
My sons favorite game is water ballons we play baseball this only if weather permits .....
you can buy a bowling game that is a great idea in case of rain...
tie ballons on there ancles and they must pop the others balloon that is fun dont blow them up to much it make it harder... but it doesnt work on grass they pop easy...
you dont have to be to creative at this age the regular pass the ball or musical chair... and free play is fine...
just make sure you have some emergency plan like a video just in case....
as for the presents I dont see why you swould say no presents I dont think people invite my son for the persents so shy would others, kids like to bring something... but if you chose to aske for no presents its ok to. if you ask for no presents then you sould not give loot bags...
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Post by Honeysmom on Mar 30, 2004 15:34:14 GMT -5
Lise, that is a good point about the presents and the loot bags, I never thought of it that way. I guess Honey has only been to one party, where we used to live, and they asked for no presents so I guess I thought it was like a new rule or something. I used to love to give presents when I was little, I remember feeling very proud.
I wish we had some place around here where I could take the kids for a party. The closest is about 45 minutes away and I wouldn't want to ask their parents to have to drive them there. I can't take them b/c they are all still in carseats or boosters yet. (Honey will be in one until he is old enough to drive at this rate!!)
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Post by loveforeric on Mar 31, 2004 12:43:47 GMT -5
Good Question!
Last year we invited all the boys in ds8 class. Most came however half of them rarely spoke to Eric at school if at all. but we thought we should invite all the boys.. A family friend of ours who was ds8 teacher last year suggested to us that we only invite who Eric considers to be friends, to this years party. That would be half the boys in his class. Is this uncommon or rude? I don't want to do that. Any suggestions.?
Thanks for listening.
Christina
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Post by vickilyn32 on Mar 31, 2004 14:46:43 GMT -5
Both my kids have always only invited the kids that they actually hang around with. We dont hand out invites at school where others would see. untill last year when my DS turned 13 we only invited kids of the same sex. We have had a few sleepovers, pool parties, bar-b-que's etc. Pinatas are great, and so are sack races, ring toss, twister if they know left from right, and we have had three legged races, only instead of tying their feet together (safty issue) we put one foot from each child in a bag and they held the top of the bag. last birthday DS finally got to invite GIRLS. He ended up inviting 30 kids to a swim/bar-b/que party. It started at 7 pm and was planned to end at 9 but kept going on untill 11 pm. Parents came at 9 and we had so much food etc left that we invited the parents to stay. Some even went home and got swimsuits and went swimming. We had a blast. DS had set up tables around the patio and had candles on them, and the kids could dance if they wanted. He wants the same thing this year but I dont know if I am up to this again.
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Post by Honeysmom on Mar 31, 2004 16:37:49 GMT -5
Christina, I have always thought that if you give out invatations as school everyone, or in this case the boys, should all be invited so no one feels left out. The other problem I have is that I don't know any of the other parents so I couldn't even send them in the mail, or call their moms. Plus, Honey insists that he has no friends, which may be true, but he is only going to be 5, so I figure I can still make the decision on who to invite.
Vickilyn, that sounds like a fun party! I'd want to do it again also if I were hm!
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