SKay
Member Emeritus
Posts: 1,126
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Post by SKay on Oct 16, 2004 15:30:55 GMT -5
What are your favorite slams on people? Someone told me that I could read him like a book, and I replied, "Well, when the pages are blank . . ." (he married me anyway.  ) I don't think this one is all that funny, but my family likes it. Years ago when my brother was in college, my sister and I were together at a function where he was (she and I both worked at the college), and she asked me to help her find him in the crowd. When I pointed him out, she said "How do you always find him?" to which I replied, "I'm a proofreader; I'm trained to find mistakes." ;D |
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Post by rosyred45 on Oct 16, 2004 15:55:28 GMT -5
Oh they are cute, and of course I am drawing a blank. Now I'm going to have to run around with a paer and pencil when I remember one in case someone is on the computer. Dang, just had one and it's gone again ::)If I coul donly remember those YOUR MAMA ones  |
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Post by camismom on Oct 16, 2004 19:12:25 GMT -5
"Whoa.... what did you do to make your hairdresser so mad?"
"Have you thought about trying some new hair products? Personally, I'm a fan of shampoo."
"This delusion you have that other people care what you think... it's kind of cute!"
"My therapist told me the next time I felt myself getting agitated to try and picture something that would make me smile..... right now I'm picturing you with duct tape over your mouth."
and my favorite work related one, taken from the movie about the boy that sees ghosts:
"I see stupid users. They're everywhere... they're on our computers and they're causing crashes."
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SKay
Member Emeritus
Posts: 1,126
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Post by SKay on Oct 16, 2004 19:34:18 GMT -5
too funny! I especially like the delusion one, Christy.
We used to say to my brother, "Hey, Dave, do that trick where you open your mouth and your face disappears!" And he would try it!
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Post by Linda on Oct 16, 2004 20:09:45 GMT -5
My brother used to say to me when we were kids....Hey ugly and I would say back....What double ugly!!  |
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Post by camismom on Oct 17, 2004 10:59:13 GMT -5
Something I use to say to my ex, and say to Cami (in good fun - and yes she knows this!) from time to time:
Is your mouth getting tired? Cause I know my ears are!!
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Post by tridlette on Oct 17, 2004 13:01:46 GMT -5
My sister always would get snotty with me...
She'd say something nasty and I would say, SO?
She'd say "Sow beans and be a farmer."
or
"Sew shirts and be a tailor."
I finally got mad enough at her one day (she was 7 yrs older than me, so, it was hard to be as quick witted as she was)
I said, "SEW your mouth shut and be quiet!"
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Post by tridlette on Oct 17, 2004 13:04:49 GMT -5
Another good one kids do to each other.
"Michael, did you know that when you put your hand open in front of your face, if it looks red it means you a very intelligent person?"
So, Michael will put his hand up, palm in front of his nose, and Patrick will shove Michael's arm so that Michael smacks himself in the face thereby giving himself a bloody nose.
"See... Michael, see how smart you are?"
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Post by camismom on Oct 17, 2004 16:39:26 GMT -5
That's mean.... funny, but mean. |
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Post by rosyred45 on Oct 18, 2004 8:06:18 GMT -5
When my sister talks and won't shut up, we tell the closest person to grab her arms and she'll shut up ;D
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Post by tridlette on Oct 18, 2004 11:07:31 GMT -5
When my sister talks and won't shut up, we tell the closest person to grab her arms and she'll shut up ;D My family has said all summer that they are enjoying all the peace and quiet while my arm is still tied up.  |
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Post by rosyred45 on Oct 18, 2004 11:11:27 GMT -5
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Post by camismom on Oct 18, 2004 13:42:37 GMT -5
I saw a window hanging thingy in a store today that would be perfect for a certain coworker I know: "If I throw a stick, will you go away?"  |
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