Things I've learned

[aimee30]

I've learned that no matter how long it's been since you've had a speeding ticket, you're not invisible to the cops.

I've learned that if you only buy one loaf of bread everyone wants a sandwich. If you buy two loaves, nobody wants one.

I've learned to never pull a huge rubber band out with both your feet and then when you have it directly in front of your face, allow it to slip off both your toes.

I've learned to never keep my nasal spray and aquarium cleaner in the same place and then use my nasal spray in the middle of night while it's dark.


What have you learned?

[Linda]

I am still trying to LEARN how to keep my mouth shut!!!

[jdmom]

I've learned to never say "Well, things can't get any worse...."

[sweety]

;D ;DNo sugar after 8PM. No more than 2 fruit roll ups before 8 PM. Hair shampooing needs to be supervised. Unladylike is not in a 10 yr olds vocabulary. Spontaneous singing is always appropriate. Stuffed animals have personalities.We are NOT to talk to babies in the store and last but not least BOYS ARE WEIRD. ;D ;D

[finnmom]

Wow Aimee ;D You´ve learned a lot Are you sure, of that invisible-thing I´ve been counting on that ;D

Sweety; those were great!!!!! And: Boy´s really are wierd ;D

[rosyred45]

Boys might be weird, and they don't get any better with age, unlike wine is supposed to ;D

I have also learned that it IS possible to have 20 things going on at the same time while you are in the bathroom, on the phone, telling your kids to knock it off, and telling your spouse where things are in the fridge


When you are low on MILK the kids want cereal for breakfast.

[songwriter]

Aimee-
Thanx for the laffs! These threads make it all worth it.


I've learned never to hold a cat while turning on the vacuum cleaner.

I,ve learned not to leave live bait in the trunk of my car in the summer time (so why do I keep doing it?) guess I HAVENT learned that one yet.

Dont walk through a dark room after kids have been playing with Legos.

Never sit on a hard wooden church pew after eating chili.

Never allow your small child to be alone with a pair of scissors.

Never buy bicycles at Wal-mart.

Never go to the bathroom after handling hot peppers.

[rosyred45]

:oouch

[finnmom]

songwriter said:

I've learned never to hold a cat while turning on the vacuum cleaner.

Dont walk through a dark room after kids have been playing with Legos.

Never allow your small child to be alone with a pair of scissors.

LOL Songwriter ;D Quite painfull thing´s you´ve learned ;D But I know those too, so I must have learned something

[rosyred45]

I have also learned that the more you plan, the more likely plans will get changed.

The more you water your flowers when there is a chance of showers, the more likely it will rain.

And it'll rain on the laundry you just hung out as well

[aimee30]

And when you wash your car, it's guaranteed to rain.

I just learned today that if you hear the toilet flush and "uh-oh" followed right behind, you're too late.

What a mess!

[rosyred45]

I have learned that I would rather have a messy house that looks lived in then a house with no love

[ohmama]

I've learned that it is impossible to stop a bloody nose while the child is throwing up at the same time. This is especially true if you suddenly pull the car over and attempt to lift the child out of his seat while his foot is caught in the seat belt. It wouldn't be so bad if the child sitting next to him wasn't hitting him for throwing up all over him. But here's the worst part.... I was miles from civilization and had no water or rags in the car to clean it all up.

[aimee30]

I've learned that wherever I go the world's worst drivers follow me there.

The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status, or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we all believe that we are above-average drivers.

Nobody is normal.

When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command. Very often, that individual is crazy.

I've learned that one good turn gets most of the blankets.

I've learned that 99% of the time when something isn't working in your house, one of your kids did it.

I've learned that whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.

That one person saying "You've made my day" makes my day. (thanks ohmama)

[buttercup]

Hehehehee - I love this thread.

I have learned that a round brush is God's gift to my social life.

I have learned to write checks down in my register after I write them.

I have learned that "Mother" plus another really bad word are pretty satisfying to say once in awhile. ;D ;D