I have a question about depression.

[MomX2]

I've asked this on other boards and it seems to be a topic of interest for many.

How would you define depression? By that I mean how do you expect a person to behave or feel when they are depressed? I've been confused over this issue for many years because I thought frequent tearfulness and sadness were the main indications of depression. In fact, I wasn't able to realize I was experiencing a sense of depression because I almost never cry.

This is how I would define depression. A feeling of emptyness, no feeling at all, feeling unmotivated or having a sense of agitation and anger combined with a feeling of being unmotivated. This can also be accompanied by a tendency to focus on too many negative thoughts (I wonder if children who express many spoken negative thoughts along with irritability are showing symptoms of depression?).

Here is one thing I've learned recently. It's important to become aware of both thoughts and feelings, not one or the other. It's easy to focus on one or the other without considering how the two things combined are affecting a person.

[HooDunnit]

I think that loneliness is often considered to be one aspect or concommitent with depression.

There is a field of psychology developing now entitled "Positive Psychology". In the last century, psychology and psychiaoty have been overweighted with the illness model of mental health. There has been a lot of emphais on deficits. Now psychologists are beginning to look more at resilience and thriving. If you do a google search under "positive psychology" you will find some interesting titles. One book that I read recently was What Happy People Know, by Baker.

[ohmama]

MomX2,
I don't know the clinical definition of depression but I sure know I have it and it's exactly what you described! I couldn't have said it better.

Also, concerning the awareness of both thoughts and feelings aka, self awareness you would love the book "Emotional Intelligence why it can matter more than IQ" by Daniel Goleman. This expands and helps with getting in touch with the connection of these feelings. It has helped me to grow as well as understand what is going on in great detail. I hope you will look into it.

[tridlette]

I have been treated for clinical depression since 1995. When I am at my worst, I wake up in the morning, and can't decide whether to go back to sleep or stay awake, to go to the bathroom or stay in bed, to listen to the radio. If I do get up, I can't decide whether to eat or not, what to eat, where to eat it, or go back to bed. I will walk out back, and can't decide whether to sit down or stand up, or go back inside.

I don't cry, I just can't get involved in life. I am short tempered and indecisive. Life is just plain empty. I don't care to eat, or drink, or sleep, or stay awake, or talk, or watch TV or read or stare into space. But I don't cry. I just plain don't FEEL.

Define it, I can't. But this is my experience. For what it is worth!

[Amsmom]

Momx2,
Welcome to our forums, we are so glad to have you here!! I was dx with clinical depression years ago. You have described it well, as have the others. Some symptoms are lack of interest in things you used to enjoy and lack of motivation. Crying is not always present. Have you sought treatment yet? There is a lot of good help available for depression. Good luck and keep us posted.

[MomX2]

In response to the question above, yes I did finally get a diagnosis. What brought this up is that my doctor's always asked me if I ever felt depressed during routine physicals and I always said no. I figured there is no way I could be depressed because I never cry and I don't feel sad. Plus even when I do feel depressed I have a lot of ways of dealing with it. Even though I don't overcome the depression I do have ways of improving my mood a little. When my methods didn't work anymore I finally asked my doctor for medication and then I had a hard time convincing him I really needed it.