I Need a Laugh

[buttercup]

Didn't know whether to put this in the Humor section or the Help section. Ugh.

I have a hard time putting things behind me. I feel like I got emotionally "slimed" by someone this weekend. It was so intense that I still feel affected by it.

Maybe I should use that technique I saw in another post of imagining that the whole thought is a bird and it is flying away.

buttercup

[ohmama]

If it works for kids it will work for anyone who has an imagination. Watch it fly away. Just be sure to replace the hurt with lots of positive thoughts. Positive thoughts bring on positive feelings.

Don't let the bird back in.

[rosyred45]

And if the bird tries to get back in, smack the crap out of it with a tennis racket Yes, the same one that is used for the bats-----I have one sitting right, dang, where's it at.....now I gotta go look for it. dang

Smile, makes people wonder what your up to. And if that doesn't work, go read the walmart activities, we need to have a walmart convention or something ;D

[buttercup]

Thanks.

Weirdly, my bird feels so big and heavy it can't get off the ground.

[rosyred45]

Oh buttercup, what happened?

HUGS to you, and if you need to, I have a pair of boots you can use to kick it out the door

[buttercup]

It's kind of too ugly to rehash, but basically someone who knows I am adhd and who knows he is severely adhd asked me for help--he is massively out of control and turns out that he mostly was just seeking easy relief from the pain he is feeling but is not interested in handling it or looking into it all further. He wants to go back t destructive stuff and tried to drag me in and down. I'm trying to put the details out of my mind. I don't ever want to see that picture again or have anything to do with the person again.

Feeling better today...I think a little sleep helped. I don't know if it's being ADHD and tending to be sensitive to other peoples' emotions, but sometimes I think I absorb it too much. My mom came over and talked with me for awhile. She was really supportive, so I ended up feeling a lot better. I am so grateful to have her.

I realized that even though I don't have a whole lot, that I struggle with this condition, and that my days are kind of quiet in a lot of ways, just having peace of mind means that I am wealthy beyond belief. It also tells me that...IT COULD BE A LOT WORSE. The struggle to handle my symptoms is truly worth it, even though it seems like a hassle and has been expensive.

[Linda]

buttercup...I am glad you made the decision to stay away from this person...you had the insight to know he was trying to take you down with him.Good for you. ;D

[rosyred45]

Do you excersize or anything? Yeah, yeah, off topic sorta. But seriously, I started to excersize again, not only for physical health, but mental health as well. There some scientific thing I would like to link to this, but I'm not 100%sure, besides, I'd end up confusing us both in the end.

Oh I wish I could remember it, but oh well, when I come across it, I'll let you know. Just basic stretching and stuff like that. That's where I always start. And I am in no way skinny. My husband laughs at me because he's less than I am, but I have more mucsle than he does, so nah to him. I also have a bit more fat, so I guess that cancels out that.

Pick up some 3-5 lb wieghts, and while your reading here, just do some basic stuff. Nothing big, not for bulk, I have to keep with the low end weights, because with my body type, I start looking like a body builder/ linebacker not pretty. You can even do that watching tv. I do it all the time, just watching VH1 or CMT, the rythm helps sometimes.

E-mail me if you want to, I'll try to find some other stuff for ya too.

HUGS to you, hope your feeling better soon

[buttercup]

Thanks. I have been very involved in exercise, but have currently fallen out of my good routine. I used to use small weights and go to the gym or work out to a dvd. Now that I have fixed my tv and gotten rid of some stressors, I am working back up to in in my mind, rosey. You know how that is, I am sure.

The first hour/day/week of any sort of exercise requires some mental preparation for me cause it just sucks so bad for me. Yes, it does really help me immensely and I look forward to that really great, stable feeling I get from it.

This guy sought out my help, but proceeded to really let me know how completely uncool I am in so many ways...said that I am uptight and basically a real "square." Sounds like a bad episode of Kojak, doesn't it? My mom and I are really breathing a sigh of relief that I never sought out drugs (illegal), cigarettes, or alcohol to handle my symptoms. Three men that I know quite well who have admitted to adhd all do this. It just compounds things so much and is so destructive. We all know this, but after this weekend my mom and I were just marvelling at how eternally grateful we are that I was able to avoid this even in my worst stages (probably my 20s and early 30s) and even without having the knowledge that adhd was my problem.

We are also really thankful that I was able to avoid the other trap of promiscuity. My mom said I just seemed to have an innate sense that these would all be bad even though I see so many people who are like me fall into both of these vices.

How I made it through those years was so rough...just a lot of crying and depression, anger, problems at work, relationship problems...ugh...you name it. It makes me really sad to see others about my age suffering and compounding their suffering.

As I explained to my mom, it reminds me of how some people who are drunk act when they go swimming. Some people get confused and just start swimming to the bottom. That's what I feel like I am witnessing. My mom said, "you could have swum to the bottom also...you had every opportunity for that, but you found a way to take the advice of people who told you to swim to the top. This guy asked you for help and you gave him the same pointer to swim the top. If people are unwilling to follow those cues, you cannot let them grab a hold of your leg to be pulled up...they will drown you." So true.

I guess I just had a full surround sound technicolor view of how disastrous adhd can be in an adult who no longer has a caring, conscientous parent around to help them navigate those treaturous waters. Worse, some never did have that parent. Some have parents who ignorantly give them horrilbe life guidance. I thank my lucky soul for my mother.

[rosyred45]

How come mom's are always right? I need to remind my kids of that sometime

Seriously, you know you and no matter how much someone who is destroying thier own life says something to the contrary, well, tough on them. That "friend" I had did nothing but bring me down. I was getting to the point of some serious depression, because she would come over and just gripe complain, let her pain in the butt kid tear my house apart, and expect me to understand. I don't think so.

That is what is refered to as toxic friends. I keep my distance from people that are negative. Granted, I don't have a lot of close personal friends for that reason, I'll just be the social butterfly flittering where I want, when I want and not letting things get me down. Or at least not let people bug the crap outta me with things that they can fix, but after I tell them how to fix it, they just revert right back to where they were, and then complain more about it.

With out sounding offensive, I come from a family of drinkers. That's just like me complaining if I drink too much and hey look, can you hold on a sec, I need to go grab another beer. UM< DUH No I'm not really getting a beer, I don't like the taste But there's a point.

You are trying to get yourself straightened around, that is what you need to keep in mind. You are not a doormat for anyone, your very special for being able to realize that with out the illegals or dependancies. Mom steered you down the right path there.

Sorry for the novel, just struck a nerve that's all