lisle
Full Member
Posts: 142
|
Post by lisle on Feb 3, 2005 14:36:55 GMT -5
Hi,
My 13 vo very adhd kid has so much trouble with authority and we feel like we have tried everything. He is currently on Adderall XR and that helps with focus but not behavior much (sometimes he tells me he decided not to say something so it helps a little). The problem is that he fails to recognize that he is subordinate in any situation. He takes over the classroom by making inappropriate jokes or deliberately giving wrong answers, insults teachers and parents and just positions himself like he is in charge no matter how many times we tell him he's not. He just gets angry and says everyone should be equals! He thinks his opinion counts as much as his dad's and mine, or more. He is so angry when we don't give him what he wants--and often we don't. We have used punishments in terms of taking away his beloved videogames, cancelling things we were going to do for him because of his attitude, and his school constantly seems to have him in the corner. Teachers say he makes fun of the work and them. He is really sophisticated in this way, but life isn't South Park, which is exactly what makes SP funny, So often he is totally subversive. What do we do?
lisle
|
|
|
|
Post by Linda on Feb 3, 2005 19:59:02 GMT -5
Has your son been dx with ODD?
|
|
lisle
Full Member
Posts: 142
|
Post by lisle on Feb 4, 2005 15:07:17 GMT -5
Hi, Linda: Yes. He has ODD. But none of the severe treatments for that seem to work and I feel guilty as hell doing them anyway because he starts to absolutely despair and talks about suicide. We have wondered if he is bp but no psychologist or psychiatrist seems to think so, even those who are up on the new stuff. One thinks he may have mild asperger's. I don't think that's it. His advice is contrary to that for ODD, i.e., the Explosive Child stuff. The school definitely just comes down hard on him.I am trying to get an fba but I swear they have that confused with punishment! I don't think they will be willing to look at it from the kid's point of view enough to figure out the triggers of his behavior. So far we think it's for peer support (kids he hangs with at school are not achievers and they laugh at his jokes, which can be really funny, though wildly inappropriate). He now has isolation for lunch for 2 weeks. Nothing seems to make clear to him he has to change. He says things like, "The teacher said I had no right to ask questions when I chose to be out in the hall. I didn't choose it; she sent me there!" Whew, missing the point, huh? Blaming others for the consequences is common, as in ODD. Sometimes he will show regret later and say he shouldn't have said or done that. But it doesn't carry over. I am so frustrated  and worried! |
|
|
|
Post by Linda on Feb 4, 2005 15:26:43 GMT -5
I am going to bump this up.....
|
|
|
|
Post by catseye on Feb 4, 2005 17:55:16 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Post by Amsmom on Feb 6, 2005 11:19:02 GMT -5
hi lisle and big  to you. my ds9 was first dx w/ odd, then adhd, then bipolar/adhd. the psychiatrist told me to look at the list of bp symptoms and asked me what i thought. i told him i thought my ds was bp and he agreed. have you looked at the www.cabf.org website? it is extremely helpful and informative. maybe if you do the checklist and then present it to his drs they would listen to you. it's amazing that no dr would even explore the possiblity of a mood disorder. in my experience, your ds seems to be exhibiting grandiose-type behavior in that he believes he is "equal" to teachers and parents and "takes over the classroom". it also sounds like he has mood swings with his anger. i hope you dont mind me saying that, i felt like i needed to share my experience and perhaps it can help you. would your drs ever consider a mood stabilizer even though they dont think he is bipolar? i can only imagine how hard this is for you, lisle. please let us know how you are doing. |
|
lisle
Full Member
Posts: 142
|
Post by lisle on Mar 31, 2005 11:52:51 GMT -5
Hi,
Well my son was threatened with alternative school and he went back on adderall, which is helping during the day,apparently, but I worry about it if he is possibly bp.
I have told the shrink this too. Every night we have an overly insistent angry kid who is crying and yelling.
We have tried all the stimulants and Straterra and he has some bad reactions to anything but adderall (though he can't get to sleep and hardly eats on this stuff). What can I do to intercept the nightly irritability, anger and crying when he doesn' get what he decides he needs (yesterday it was signing up for something on the internet!).
lisle
|
|
|
|
Post by kurs10b on Mar 31, 2005 12:02:42 GMT -5
My son has similar reactions to not getting his way. When he is really freaking out and throwing a tantrum, I will sit on him. I put him (forcably if needed) on the ground or bed and will sit over him and hold his hands down so he cant hit or anything. I dont hurt him, it is more of a control thing. When he is being held down, he knows he isnt in control. It doesnt usually take more than a few minutes to calm him down now that he knows what I am doing. The first few times there were major struggles, but now I dont have to do it as often. Dont know if this is something you want to try, but it is an option.
|
|
|
|
Post by AustinsMom on Mar 31, 2005 13:01:15 GMT -5
lisle--it's good to hear from you. I think both of us took a break from posting for awhile. So you are back on adderall....sounds like the rebound is making life tough for you.
You know my ds has that same "larger than life" personality, feeling on par with adults, thinking he knows everything. After making statements like "I know everything about baseball" and being insolent toward instruction, I had one of those moments when I almost needed to be picked up off the floor. (I actually cried when I told my husband about it.) My ds astonished me by saying--"I hate to admit it, but a couple of the kids on the team are better than I am". I know that doesn't sound like much, but that is such a huge deviation from his usual attitude.
So I was looking back for what brought this on (so I can make sure I do more of it!) Trying the zoloft made the anger/agression go WAY down. We have been backing down on the zoloft, and are at half the initial dose, but have been for a month so that's not a new change. We have added spirulina to add B vits since he can't take a B supplement and they are needed to make serotonin. Also found he can tolerate the Primer Vits from Pfeiffer, so he is getting B6 in higher doses. And it's the B6 that is the most recent addition.
I really feel like the low serotonin and trying ways to boost it is the key that has improved everything the most. I found something about low serotonin being linked to poor judment too. If you'll private message me your email I'll send that to you.
I know you have tried so much, but can't remember if you've looked at increasing serotonin, so thought I'd mention it as something to research. Our kids have so many similarities. Sorry you're still in a rough place. Hang in there.
|
|
|
|
Post by AnneM on Mar 31, 2005 14:00:34 GMT -5
|
|
