my mum wants me to take my meds again

[anneke]

hello

When I finished school in september I stoped to take my ritalin. I feel great. Now that I am in Peru i feel verry good and my bag has still the same things in it , not that I forgot half of it.

my mum wants my to take ritalin again when I am back and I have to go working. she is scared that I wont be able to manage it without meds.

normaly it should be me that should be scared, I think.

any advice how I can say to my mum I realy dont want anny meds annymore, that I first want to try it without them. I tried to explain but I failed.

If I where your kid, what would you say, with or without meds.
I think 10 years is more than enough, the problem is not my behaviour but my concentration

Anneke

[Sorka]

There is a time when you have to decide for yourself what you want. It sounds like that time has come and you have already made your choice.
There is also a time when parents have to let go, and let their kids make their own choices. It sounds like that time is coming to your mother.

You must stand up for your decision, however you can make a compromise an agreement, that should certain things happen that you will agree to take your medication again. You would need to sit down with your mother and work those conditions out. That might make her feel more comfortable with your choice. Then it is on you to make sure those things don't happen but to abide by your mother's judgement if they do.

Does this sound reasonable?
Denise

[Honeysmom]

Since I do not know you that well it is hard to as if you need them or not. If I were you I would ask your mom if you can try it without meds and if you do well stay off, or on a reduced dose. If you do not do well then go back on.

I am sure your mom is just worried about you. She wants you to do the best you can and she is concerned that without the meds you may not be at your best. She is just trying to look out for you.

If on the other hand you have tried to go without meds recently and it didn't work then I think you should listen to your mom. ADD is not something that you are going to grow out of. There are many adults that take meds for ADHD/ADD.

[camismom]

Funny you should bring this up. I posted a thread not long ago (end of November maybe?) about my dd12 wanting to try and go without her meds. She basically told me that she wanted to see if she could "control her behaviors" herself. It is a constant prayer of mine that this will happen one day, that she'll "outgrow" it in the sense of no longer being med dependent, and I thought, we'll never know until we try. Unfortunatley she didn't do well without them and she saw that herself. We did exactly what Sorka suggested. I told her I would allow her to go without them but at first sign of her falling behind in school, she needed to accept that she wasn't there yet and that she still needed them for now. She agreed to that, and that is exactly what happened.

You are an adult and have a right to say what does or doesn't go in your mouth. You just need to calmly explain to your mom that you feel you have reached a point where meds are no longer needed and ask her to trust this and give you a chance. Reach the compromise suggested and go from there. Let your mom know you see and appreciate her concern, but you are sincere and ask that she see your side too and give you a chance to prove yourself. And agree that if you see after returning to work that it is needed, you will take it again, not for her but for yourself.

Good luck!

[anneke]

thanks for youir replies I am giong to let my mum read this. I think she should give me a chance, she is probabely just as scared as my. she feels like it is the last step of raising me, that I get a good job.

It sorded out fine for my brother, he s a mechanic and there wil always be things that brake down and need reparing. she s woried becouse I cant work with my hand , I have to use the brain that somethimes refuses to work.

greats Anneke