My turn to VENT!

[tridlette]

I sent e-mail to all academic teachers this week:


How is Michael doing so far? Does he have any big projects, tests, or reports due soon? And did he ever get a grade on his big English Report that was due at Easter time (he says he hasn't gotten it back yet)?

Please let me know soon, so that I can enjoy a peaceful Mother's Day.

Science teacher sent me a not so nice note:

I was just about to drop you a line. Mike handed in a lab that was of real poor quality. Rather than grading it, I just gave it back without grading it and told him to rewrite it. He just gave it back to me with thing still missing. I gave it back to him again and told him to have it for me tomorrow with all the parts. His present average is a 38 because I only have one lab. report and he got a 70 on the first one. We are coming to the end of the year. This behavior needs to change before he becomes a sophomore.

History teacher:

He has a history test tomorrow (Friday)

Math teacher:

So far so good (knocking hard and loudly on wood!) – took a test today and has corrections tomorrow. Will let the class know their averages on Monday.

Long term English Sub (reg teacher assigned to redesign the school district and student teacher took over for 3rd semester.)

"I’m a little concerned that he is lacking some motivation. So far, out of the five 5-10 point assignments that the students have done with me so far, I have one. He handed in the bigger, 30 point chart that I assigned, but he only completed a portion of it, and none of it was on time. The result is that he will only receive 8.5 points out of 30.

I know enough about Michael from my brief experience and from what Ms. G. and Ms. H. have told me to know that he is very capable of doing quality work"

I want to reply to them as follows, but I feel very caustic towards them all, and I guess I just don't want to as viscious as this...

I expect Michael to make an effort in class, and I know he is a smart boy, but I am frustrated that it is documented in his IEP that he has a writing disability and everyone keeps expecting him to instinctively know how to do quality work. Is anyone actually TEACHING him what is documented as his deficiencies? I get graded assignments that say, "You need to learn how to..." with notations to "come see me after school." I thought that we sent him to school so that he could be taught during school hours. Each teacher expects him to stay after for additional help. What is he being taught from 7:30 to 2:30 each day?

If this isn't bad enough, school doesn't get out until June 16th. Mid semester grades aren't even due out for another 2 weeks! He got his English paper back yesterday, it was turned in in MARCH~ at least he got a 90 on it!

It is so hard to not be negative in front of him when the teachers are so USELESS. I actually sent an e-mail back to the science teacher yesterday:

"Thanks for responding. My heart is breaking watching this kid who has such potential falling through the cracks. I have been trying to cope with a death in the family and am emotionally exhausted. Please help me.

Can you tell me the parts needed in the lab report? I have tried to supervise Michael's lab reports because he has a documented writing disability. But I don't know what is needed in a lab report. I have tried to keep copies of papers sent home throughout the year, but I do not have an outline to follow. Each lab report has become more of a thorn in our side. Without a guideline to follow, I don't know what else to do to teach Michael how to write a lab report.

He used to love science, but these reports have totally blown away his self confidence in Science. Now he is feuding with his best friend over the reports. Michael doesn't knows what to do, and he has been left floundering. I am trying to guide him, but without a lesson plan and a book to work from, I am at a loss. It isn't his behavior that is the problem, the problem is that he doesn't even know what questions to ask because he is too lost. Please tell me how to help him find a starting point. He can't figure it out on his own."

NO REPLY YET. I HATE THIS. He hates school, he hates teachers. He even says he hates me, because I push him to do his work and turn it in. If they would DO their JOB, then I wouldn't have such a knot in my stomach for 3 1/2 semesters a year.

I don't know what I expect, but I just need to vent. I won't send the NASTY-GRAM that I want to the teachers, but I have the satisfaction of at least voicing my frustrations.

Thanks!

[mothercat]

Vent away !

I realize that teachers have more than one to deal with but when it is ALL documented you would think they could understand and take the time (or get a teachers aide who could ..I know schools have volunteers) .
JAred hasn't had homework for over a week and I am scared to ask at this point. This time of year I am very busy, the teachers are cranky, the kids are cranky, and everyone has short fuses..kinda sucks. It is sooo close to the end of the year ..I really think they just stop caring to keep parental contact in these cases unless you force them to. To be honest I cant hardly stand it either it is like hurry up and go away time.

I wish you luck and peace and a lot of tranquility in dealing with the teachers considering all you have been going thru.

[amcfanny]

Isn't this such a nice place to come and vent. Hope you feel an itsy bitsy bit better. It's such a big emotional drain to handle isn't it. Don't you have to sit down in the beginning of the year and form the IEP and have everything put down on paper on how you want things handled? Can't you request a review of the IEP? It doesn't sound like it's working or adequate or the school isn't taking it seriously. I'm so clueless on all the proper procedures - I'd have to at least make a call to the guidance counselor or assistance principal about the problems.

[AnneM]

Trid I read this and I thought OMG!! I agree with the "gut" reply you wrote !! ... I really feel my bristles going right UP at these replies!!

However, I think the reply you DID write to the Science teacher was just RIGHT ...

WHY WHY WHY do teachers (all over the world I might add!) have to be soooo darn negative !! .. Why can't a teacher be more positive AND more constructive ?? (considering that they should ALL KNOW about Michael's documented writing disability!!

GRRRRR R!! You vent away Trid ... I am right there on that broomstick WITH YOU!!

[mothercat]

I think IEP's only legally have to be reveiwed once a year and then if they dont qualify and you want them retested it is only once in three years( thats what the school told us).. putting it on paper doesn't mean every teacher is gona follow it especially jr high and high school teachers as they have so many kids a day they find some things difficult...like doing their job properly. ;D
venting makes it better.. it is so wonderful to have somewhere to vent where people actually understand what we are feeling.

[Linda]

GO GET EM TRID!!!!

[amcfanny]

mothercat said:

... putting it on paper doesn't mean every teacher is gona follow it especially jr high and high school teachers as they have so many kids a day they find some things difficult...like doing their job properly. ;D

Thanks for the heads up...sure can be more than frustrating. You think you've got things all taken care of for your kid but then it's not.

[mothercat]

You are gonna find out that to stay on top of taking care of things for your kid ..it will take day to day checking and monitoring in school. Parent -teacher communication is very very important..lots of it. Betweeen keeping caught up, grief from other kids,med adjustments, behavior problems, and teacher participation and understanding.. it is a full time job just to maintain your kids education. If it werent for venting
goodness only knows what would happen to us older mothers ;D ;D I mean we are prime age for strokes and heart failure ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
I think Tridlette will handel the situation..she is right up there with Linda and they can handle anything wouldn't want to be the teacher.

[finnmom]

Trid, I´m so sorry about your prblem´s with school I remember this is not the first time eather ...

I know Michael is very bright boy, do you think that get´theacher´s a bit blindfolded so they do see the capacity and dont even start thinking the writing disability Lousy excuse, I know, but .......eather that or then they just dont care at all

5 week´s more to go(approx.) so you´ll make it throuhg this year too, with or without their help.... I wouldnt send your first reaction eather, nbut I think I would make a little smoother(still very powerfull) letert to them.... like; As we all know, it has been written in his IEP, and I assume that all theacher´s should follow that in their work......add some bitter mark´s about the fact´s they´ve forgot to do

Trid, hang in there, at least he has a good mom who´s taking care of his bisnes

[tridlette]

Thanks for the votes of confidence.

The science teacher retires in 5 weeks, and I don't think he really cares about anything. He is the academic member of the IEP team, and when I decided to push for the learning disability testing in October, he rolled his eyes and said, "he just doesn't try". My point to him was that in Michael's mind, it is less humiliating to not try than to try hard and still not be successful.

Then along comes the psychologist report saying that Michael's disability occurs in less than 0.01 % of the population! HA! I wanted to be nasty then, but I just pushed forward hoping for the best.

Michael has a solid 67 average in science... 66 is an F. And now I find out that the year end final exam is to WRITE a spontaneous lab report in class during a 2 hour time block. GRRR! There goes the year.

Did I mention that I finally got back the English paper from Easter break? He got a 90 on it~ Yippee!!! He will pass English. And he will pass Math if the teacher has to adopt him for the rest of the year. The Math teacher is gifted, ADHD, LD, and deaf in one ear (I think Patrick might be his clone!) He knows where Michael is coming from, but there are certain district requirements that Mr. R. has to submit to pass Michael, and Michael wasn't doing them. So Mr. R. has pounced on him, daily detention to get the work done one-on-one. They take 10 minutes and everything is complete...

History I think will be okay also... Michael was dating the identical twins during the first semester, and they had study dates all the time. The girls made sure his work looked great, so he had an A first semester.

I am waiting on this week's question survey of the teachers... and tomorrow night I am going to the school board meeting.

We shall see. The weather forcast is for 60 degree nights and clear skies... so it will be good broom flying weather! LOOK OUT DISTRICT!

[camismom]

Laurie, if you are having trouble with sending that email, just forward it on to me.... I have no trouble with pushing "SEND" when it comes to this kind of crap!!!

I so agree with the comment you made about it being less humiliating not to try than to try and fail. I agree with everything you are saying and asking. All I can say is go get them!! If he has a documented writing disability then that spontaeous lab report final should not apply to him. Get on that teacher and make sure it doesn't.

aw hell.... just hang on..... I'm on the way!

[tridlette]

Thanks Christy! I checked the weather channel... good flying weather is predicted!

I literally had written the whole nasty message, then just Cut and Pasted it into this thread and deleted it from my send list... I don't know. I am so afraid of stepping on Michael's toes. He doesn't want Mommy interfering and "making my life worse".

I am going to pull out his IEP again, review it, and make sure that Mr. Science KNOWS what he can grade on, and that he has to allow extra time and the resource room for the testing environment.

Thanks for the encouragement. REALLY, it HELPS. I am on the emotional rollercoaster this month. So, every little positive reinforcement you give me is a huge plus!

Laurie

[camismom]

tridlette said:

Thanks Christy! I checked the weather channel... good flying weather is predicted!

I literally had written the whole nasty message, then just Cut and Pasted it into this thread and deleted it from my send list... I don't know. I am so afraid of stepping on Michael's toes. He doesn't want Mommy interfering and "making my life worse".

I am going to pull out his IEP again, review it, and make sure that Mr. Science KNOWS what he can grade on, and that he has to allow extra time and the resource room for the testing environment.

Thanks for the encouragement. REALLY, it HELPS. I am on the emotional rollercoaster this month. So, every little positive reinforcement you give me is a huge plus!

Laurie

Well, as you said.... you have been dealing with a loss these past few weeks and you are in grieving process. You shouldn't have to pull out the IEP and review it so you can remind the teacher of it. This is their job, not yours. Unfortunately, as we all know.... they don't so we have to. Don't worry about stepping on toes, this is your child and you do what you have to. Next year Michael will be history to this teacher anyway.