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Post by Honeysmom on Mar 26, 2004 11:46:07 GMT -5
Honey's school called today. They want permission to speak with his doctors about his develpoment. I think this is a good idea, and I appreciate that they are working with me and want to investigate more, but is this a good idea? I am not sure so let me know either way so I can make a good choice on this. My only concern is how much information they would actually get. I don't think that there is anything that I would not want them to know. Like I said, the reason they want it is b/c they are concerned about his development, he is still not progressing in S&L, and they are watching him really close in class. His behavior as far as being a good boy is really good, but he is still doing weird things and they think they should evaulate, or help find someone better to evluate him for Autism. (sure, now they want to, but not when I suggested it months ago!  ) They also want to do a home visit. Any thoughts?? Thanks...Becky |
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Post by mom2tj on Mar 26, 2004 12:11:42 GMT -5
hmmm I have mixes feelings about it... you dont want them to thing your hidding anything yet you want to know what is being said... tought one... is it possible to request a 3 way conference call? tell them that your input in the conversation might be of help or you might have something to add in there conversation... if this is not possible is the school willing to update you about what was said. my other concern is that if you say yes today will that mean you say yes for always?I think if you say yes I would ask if it is possible to be notified of every conversation being held. its worth asking... the more I think about it I would cooperate yet I would ask all they could say is no... the home visit I would agree with you dont want them to think that you have anything to hide. I still cant beleive that cute little boy can do anything bad  not willingly anyway ;D |
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Post by jdmom on Mar 26, 2004 12:13:29 GMT -5
Oh, gosh. I don't know if I like the idea of a home visit? How would he benefit from that? What would it tell them about his development? I would worry they were just being nosy?
But letting them talk to the doc sounds okay. We are so INVOLVED with our children that sometimes we miss things (because it's an everyday thing for us). I can't think of any harm in letting them speak with the doc. If you have misgivings, make a list of your pros and cons and see how they balance out. What does your hubby think?
If they are thinking about doing some extra evaluation, that would definitely be a benefit for you. I would let them speak with the doc, if they agree to the evals? Give a little, take a little, right?
But the more I think about it, the less I like the home visit idea. What's the purpose?
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Post by Honeysmom on Mar 26, 2004 13:11:26 GMT -5
You both have really good points. The purpose of the home visit is so that they can see if he acts the same way around here as he does at school. I guess they are trying to decide if they are missing things also, sort of like we see the kids all the time so we don't notice things. Well, I guess they want to see him in an enviroment other than school.
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Post by finnmom on Mar 26, 2004 13:16:35 GMT -5
Honeysmom you could ask them to set a get-together w/ you, doc and them, that way you will know what they are asking, is it a need-to-know or just plain and simple nosy  Then you wouldn´t have to worry about how much info they get and of what  The homevisit sound´s little wierd, what are they expecting that to solve what is the goal on that You have to, and want to be co-operative, but you may make the rule´s for it, so you could feel comfortable with it. Ask them to have this school-doc-parent´s meeting to discuss of those educatonal matter´s you have! What ever you deside, I know you do the best for your child! Good luck! Marja |
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Post by lauries on Mar 26, 2004 14:48:23 GMT -5
Becky,
I agree to limit the amount of info or at least monitor it.
As far as the home visit. I don't think they will see your son act as he would at home with them there. I don't know about your children, but my son always needs to put on a show for company. So it would not be a true evalutation IMO.
I would cooperate as much as you feel comfortable with.
Be thankful your support team is keeping such a close eye on him. Keep the lines of communication open with them...we do need allies in the schools.
Good Luck
Laurie
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Post by mom2tj on Mar 26, 2004 15:12:41 GMT -5
My ds doest not act the same at school as he does at home and teachers dont beleive that..... at home he does'nt foul around when I say no its NO and there is no 2 ways about it, sometimes I am to strict but he knows not to cross the line .... at 1st I didnt beleive the teachers that he acted the way he does at school  I had to see it for myself to beleive it  I am not trying to say he is perfect angel at home no way... there are things that we dont see or we tolorate that cant be so at school, thats why I would agree if they want to see him at home, example : in kindergarden he had a hard time waiting his turn he had no simblings at the time so it was not a issue at home sharing also wasnt an issue, after talking to his teacher she sugested we try things like coloring and with him and not letting him have the colors he wanted WHEN he wanted all things that I never thought of... if he wanted the color, I just gave it to him it didnt matter to me or what chair he wanted to sit in I'd let him chose all the time I was not doing him any good, in the end these are things we dont see we dont have a problem with it but it might be a problem at school ...... these thing are most likely not a problem with your DS since he has a sister but maybe there is something else. I would have no objections to it I see no harm in it but I would have a time limit.... P.S. this is just my opinion whatever you are comftorble with if you are not dont let them pressure you into anything.... |
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Post by BBW4EVR1 on Mar 27, 2004 3:29:33 GMT -5
Here is my nickels worth:
You get copies of your child's medical records and you take them to a meeting with the teachers--you can answer their questions just as well as your doctor can. As for the home visit, your word on your child's behavior should be enough! AMEN!!
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Post by aimee30 on Mar 27, 2004 21:34:46 GMT -5
I wouldn't worry about the home visit as much as the medical info. Here they do home visits twice a year in preschool and kindergarten. No big deal. The medical info. I would want to know if they would have constant access to it. If not I think I might agree to it. I also think I might check into getting your own records for them. It may cost you a little money (here I think it's about $25 for copies) but in the end it might be worth it. That way, you know they don't have access without your permission.
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Post by AnneM on Mar 28, 2004 13:48:07 GMT -5
Hmmmm ... a toughie! ... If you "block a home visit" and "only give them certain information" you are in danger of not giving them the "full" picture ... which could in turn make the whole process pointless! ...
I would be more inclined to be completely open ... and say "this is Honey at school ... this is Honey at home ... this is the FULL picture ... Now DO something to help him!" ...
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Post by Honeysmom on Mar 29, 2004 12:27:10 GMT -5
I talked to them again today. All they want from his doctor is the info that pertains to develpoment. The rest of his record they are not even asking for. They also just want to talk to him about Honey's develpoment, and I would be included on a 3 way call, so I am OK with that.
As far as the home visit goes, I have nothing to hide, so I guess they can come. I don't think Honey will act himself since they will be here, but whatever.
I am finally getting them to see the things I do and I have to take advantage of that and run with it. If I don't, they might not want to help Honey anymore, and this is what it is all about anyway.
Thanks so much for everyone's input, and I never would have thought to ask about a 3 way call if you guys didn't suggest it. Everyone here is always so much more help then they realize!!
Thanks...Becky
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