What ? to ask on evaluation meeting

[eaccae]

Madison,

"My kid is struggling in class papers and homework and it's all very HARD for her!" Their first response is "Well, it does them GOOD to HOLD them back a year." I think it's more than that to tell the truth but MAYBE??

You are so right! One of the things I asked for specifically was "executive dysfunction" - which is basically organization. The school has told me every year that DS should be held back - due to organizational skills. Academically he was on target. It was all his organizational skills. I told them - look - I have organizational problems, his dad has organizational problems - they aren't going away if you hold him back a year. DH was held back in third grade for the same thing. And it did nothing. Get a clue people. I have no problem hoding DS back - if they gave me valid reasons. But in my opinion their reasons were prolonging dealing with a problem. Putting it off for a year. His IQ tests came back and he scored extremely high - even all the subtests were extremely high. So I felt happy that I could turn it around kind of on the school - if he is doing grade level work but his effort is inconsistent - and he is not reaching his potential - then what is it that the SCHOOL has to do to achieve this. I told the psychologist that I wanted to know how they could teach to my child appropriately while dealing with his organizational problems, etc.

I want you to know - don't lose hope. DS started 1st grade not reading a word. 2nd grade - in October of 2nd grade he was at a reading level of 18 by June he was at a reading level of 33. This was a huge growth! In the beginning I was convinced he had memory problems. When he read - he sounded out EVERY word - including "the", "with", "by" - even "I". These were sight words that he SHOULD have memorized - but he had to sound them out every single time. When the tests came back - turns out one of his highest scoring tests were with memory - both visual and auditory. Go figure! A couple of things that helped us - he could sing his books better than reading them (although this was so annoying for me but it helped). We also used "Hooked on Phonics" in first grade - it is expensive - but it really was a great program.

I wish I could remember which one it was - one of the subtests he was given - the psychologist said that research has shown it to be related to reading problems - it was one of the processing subtests - it was DS's lowest test - 110. But he was doing well in reading now - it is now one of his biggest strengths - who would have figured!

I know I am rambling! I haven't had enough coffee yet this morning !

This is what I told the school - basically that his organizational problems came along with the ADHD - they weren't going away - they were inherited and from experience I can attest that they are not going away!!! You can hold him back forever - they aren't going away!!! I wanted an IEP in place (for his writing LD) and his organizational problems because they are an issue every year and I am deeply cocerned about how this is going to affect him in 4th grade and especially during the transition into the intermediate school - how is he going to function? I used the word "we" here with the principal meaning both us as parents and them as the school - I told her that WE needed to get him the tools he needs to be successful not only in school but in life! That we CAN teach him some organizational skills over time - but we have to start early and we have to start noW! Luckily - she agreed. So keep that in the back of your head as well!!! I think schools like to "write off" disorganization as developmental - but when it goes hand in hand with a disorder like ADHD - it is NOT a developmental skill that is going to go away.[/font]

Anyway - now that I have rambled and rambled . . .

I hope that all goes well with the tests she was given! Can't wait to hear how it goes!

Jenn - make sure you post how your meeting went this morning!!

Elizabeth

[Jenn]

I found out a lot at the meeting today. Mikie is doing good. The principal called on the teacher and let me know in front of her that she had told his teacher that with Mikie you have to put his coat on or he will forget it. She said that from class room to bus mikie can manage to lose the entire contents of his bag...

He is starting ot have more problems because the first 6 weeks was review. He is perfect in his homeroom class because she never see's him without meds. He starts to come down around lunch when it is time for his noon dose. So Resource is ok but could be better, by the time he get's back to homeroom meds are full force so she cannot imangine that Me the princpal and Resource is talking about the same little boy she has.

He not falling behinde or anything like that, but some days are so much better than others. They said he get's frustrated and all and needs more help with letter and number rec.

Said maybe ODD which is somewhat passive depending on what is going on. ie Mikie don't do that and he does it, or the frist line is left to right than the second line is right to left and so on.

He act's up at lunch, throwing food and such. On the bus the princpal about had a stroke because she went on the bus and saw him screaming and everything, nothing like he is in a stable setting.

He gave a bloody nose the other day but didn't get in trouble because this boy is twice his size and in first also and a bully and tried to take his ball and Mikie, the smallest in frist grade kept saying no and finally gave a head butt. They said they told him he was wrong but sceretly was jumping for joy because he is so tiny and stood up for himself and knew he did wrong.

I know I went on and on and on, but that is how the meeting went.

Also does anyone know where to get a good Conners list? They are using the SNAP form and it doesn't quite cover the basis and the other forms they have don't apply to Mikie on almost half the things.
Anyway to those still in the process of testing and meetings good luck and hope you get good support and such.

[Madison]

;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

Hey...eaccae and Jenn,
Jenn why is it when I look at that picture of you with your post you look like your about ready to KICK some A**! lololol!! You know I'm just kidding!

Well, thank you both for your letters. I'm learning alot from the the both of you! My husband said the VERY same thing about "He wants a IEP or something put in place becasue holding her back another year WON'T do one bit of good but drag on a problem that has been going on since she very first started school!" I guess as a mother it's hard for me to face I've got a kid that is slower than the other students and DOESN'T keep up with material like the rest of them. I hope this meeting will go smoothly. Her classroom teacher hasn't been at school this week and won't be back until after Thanksgiving. This sub doesn't know anything about my childs need for extra help. I hope this won't set her back any! Well, going to close...take care...Madison

;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

[Jenn]

could be the resizing for the post that makes it look like that...;D

Mikie did have some issues with a sub one day. He doodled and just out right did bad on his stuff. I hope things work out for the better Madisons mom. He is seeming to want more independance and he is strating to really mock me you know how i mean. It just makes me mad and I know i should not react but I do.

Anyway, good luck again.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!!

[tridlette]

A Buzz Phrase I have picked up recently might light a fire under the district!

Ask them what COMPENSATORY EDUCATION they will be giving to your child after the evaluation is done to make up for the lost time. Remind them that he/she has already lost nearly two semesters of necessary accomodations for their learning style, and your request was made in a reasonable time. You do not feel that your child should need to repeat a year or attend summer school because of the district stalling. But remember to SMILE politely while asking your questions in an innocent tone of voice!

Laurie

[Madison]

;D ;D Hey Tridlette ;D ;D

That a REALLY good idea you have there!!! I was thinking too she's LOSING alot and feel all they can do is summer school and she'll have a FIT in there being summer and school is a struggle to begin with and nothing like facing 6 weeks of something you really dislike!! I feel that summer school for a ADD/ADHD child is punishment in so many ways it's hard for them and they need that BREAK from school and so do I!! My sister in law did that with her child and when Aug came around she couldn't get her child to go to school at all!! She said "I'll never do that summer school again!" I'm afraid I'll face the same thing. My child got her mid-term grades yesterday. Teacher said possitive words but of course I got the usual PINK SLIP in the mail that she's got a D in launguage. Last semister it was a D in reading so that's changed a little." She put she's doing overall pretty well. Language is hard for her due to the ever changing directions and she often knows the answer but can't remember the directions. We will keep working." It's about a COPY from the last pink slip I got when she got a D in reading. Reading C, Spelling C, Language D, Math C, Social Studies C, Science B. These grades are with a TON OF WORK!! Me helping her through about ever INCH of her homework!! Well, just wanted to thank you for the GREAT TIP! If you see any thing that I could bring up in our Dec meeting out of these words PLEASE let me know...I'm still very LOST on all of it! Got to talk to the princible the other day. Just chit chat and she said "I know you said your child is stuggling in class but so many parents are wanting STRAIGHT A students and that's just so impossible to acheive." I thought....hmmmmm straight A's I would NEVER expect her to make straight A's....all I want is her to get a C or better so she can go on with the class! She didn't say a thing about our meeting. I guess she really doesn't know anymore than me or that's what she said not too long ago. Well, take care and


HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!!!!! /color]

[eaccae]

Madison - I agree with you on the summer school thing. Plus - for us - it is only about an hour every day for six weeks. DS NEEDS that break plus the kids and I travel almost the entire summer - I have 5 sisters - one in Chicago, one in South Carolina, two in Belgium and one in Holland. My grandmother that I must visit every summer is in West Virginia! It's the only time to see a lot of these people so Summer School is out!!!

I received the rest of the tests from the special ed teacher but I don't really understand what she is trying to say - she is calling me on Monday. The tests were for the dysgraphia diagnosis and the testing looks pretty consistent with that - he is average to above average on everything and then plummets to a score of 5 on his actual handwriting. There is over a ten point spread here - I mean he is in a low percentile. She mentioned how he had to take an abnormal amount of breaks even though the testing periods were short and that his hand hurt, etc. But her last sentence sounds like she is dismissing it to his not paying attention to capitals, etc and that he wasn't trying because he thought it was too hard. Well he thinks math is too hard but he did those tests fine! And he does his work at school and at home even though he hates it and thinks it is hard! Wouldn't he have functioned poorly with math if he stopped doing things because they were too hard? Wouldn't that carry over into everything else? And since it seems from the testing that the process of writing is NOT as difficult for him - it is clearly in the mechanics - isn't this saying something? Especially since for 2 years his teachers AND the OT AND the other special ed teacher have said that he tries sooooo hard with the mechanics of writing but it is so painful for him. It sounds to me like they are trying to get out of the OT. Or that this special ed teacher isn't getting it. This is making me soooooo mad. This is a different special ed teacher then the one he has worked with the last 3 years. I wish they had her - she KNEW him. And the fact that in all of the tests he was given this is so much lower - DRASTICALLY lower than all the others - which indicates a handwriting problem . . . I guess I will have to see what she says on Monday. But part of the the info I gave them on Dysgraphia makes it clear that it is a processing problem and that it is NOT laziness or inattentiveness! I am so frustrated. I'll hear what she has to say - but I have a feeling it will be my turn on Wednesday to get that pointy hat out!

[Madison]

;D Hi eaccea,
I'm thinkijg as of now...my thoughts are always CHANGING...LOL!!
I feel I totally FILLED them on my concerns about school whatever it might be for a child. Mine has learning difficulties and THEY need to know that! They need to see her in a different light. She's not going to be able to keep up at this pace!! If they FAIL her and with ME telling them MY concerns then THEIR going to HEAR from me! I DON'T expect my child to FAIL A GRADE after I TOLD them she's having trouble and REQUESTED for her to receive the EXTRA help she truly NEEDS... It's like once a parent has discussed with the school in LENTH their child is having learning difficulties then it's the SCHOOL responsiblity to help her in whatever way so that child WON'T fail a grade! I don't feel doing summer school is addressing the problem. They need to handle that during school hours so she won't come home with a TON of homework and expect ME to walk her through it all! My husband said "LOOK, I'm NOT a teacher they are and they better be putting my tax dollars to WORK to get her the help she NEEDS!" He REFUSES to keep drilling and going over this material with her until she finally has it down enough to get a C and so many times it's a D or F! The only thing keeping her from FAILING is her HOMEWORK and she usually gets a A because I'M HELPING her with every ounce of it! Otherwise it would be failing for sure. That's why she's holding on with alot of C grades. This is only 2nd grade....That's why it's SOOOO IMPORTANT to address ANY learning problems EARLY as possible! I should have done this in kindergarden and didn't...I so HOPED she would catch on with a little age but that doesn't happen...They fall farther behind!
I was told that COLORING really helps with handwritting. Maybe say "If you do a really good job on your coloring papers via keeping in the lines and making your letters maybe just at home for awhile I'll give you a nickle for every GOOD paper? Then extend that to papers at school. Watch him closely when he's doing the coloring like a school paper to correct him before it becomes too much of a mess. I've got a Pre-K child and I'm working with him right now with holding a pencil and trying to write his name. It's A MESS...but at least he's trying. Last year he wouldn't work iwth me at all but after he turned 5yrs it was time for him to start with the basics. We do lots of coloring sheets and I got a writting tablet....He DOESN'T really like writting on the tablet but I do try to get him to do that at least once a week. It's becasue he's got to keep in the lines. WEll, Hope things work out with school. My child too on the regular testing evaluations each year tested totally NORMAL range when she took them last year. I'm sooo wondering what those assetments came out with this year??? Well, going to close...keep me posted!

take care........Madison

[Jenn]

I am sure most if not all of y'all know this but this is a reminder i got from my ped doc. You must make the request in writing and date it. They have 90 days to address your concerns and after that they are in violation with Fedreal Law or what ever law it fall under the Children with disabilites or something like that. After that you can get a lawyer from legal aide or something. Just the thought of a lawyer usually get's their butts in gear. He said the school will try every trick in the book to not test from saying it is the ped's job to saying there is no funding. He said push push push, make them wish they listened to you the first time round. Said that as much as we hate to be "mean and pushy" when it comes to our special needs kids you have got to be very pushy.