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Post by Honeysmom on Dec 12, 2003 0:40:14 GMT -5
I am curious, do you guys, or you partners ever feel like you are loosing your abilities for certain things. Like I used to be a great speller and writer, now I can't even spell easy words right, or remember the form to use. Six months ago I was writing 15 page papers with no problem. I also noticed that while I can sort out some of my thoughts, like deciding what housework needs to be done first, or what errands to run are ok. But when talking I keep forgetting want I wanted to say right in the middle. Even on the site here I am bouncing around. I do not know if it is b/c now I am taking meds I am noticing it more, like I can see my shortfalls now or what. I know it is not age, I'm too young for that. Just curious...Thanks..Becky
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Post by LitlBaa on Dec 12, 2003 0:54:49 GMT -5
Hubby does this all the time...I call it changing channels. He forgets what he wants to say, what he went in the other room to look for, where his sunglasses or car keys are, you name it, he's lost it.
Before his dx he thought he was developing Alzheimer's and was really scared about it. Strattera has helped, but he still loses something nearly every day.
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Post by Jorgy on Dec 12, 2003 9:15:31 GMT -5
;D I call it mental overload or brain farts! Whatever, but as my life has become more involved, I have become more forgetful and less orginized at times. Sue
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SKay
Member Emeritus
Posts: 1,126
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Post by SKay on Dec 12, 2003 10:07:31 GMT -5
Yes, I feel that way too. I can't remember things like I used to. I have more trouble planning and finishing things, fulfilling my responsibilities, etc. My problem could be age, increased responsibilities, or as my dr suspects, depression.
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Post by Douglas on Dec 12, 2003 10:47:36 GMT -5
You are describing the disintegration of my life!
All my days, I have been a prolific writer and artist, and in recent years a
fruitful researcher.
Since passing into middle age, my powers have gently disintegrated in my
hands. What used to take minutes now takes hours (sex included), and what
used to take hours now takes days. My feelings about myself have bottomed
out, as I have faced family failures, professional barriers, and the cold
realization that I simply can't do all the things I could once do (for
instance, I used to direct community theater, and now I am embarrassed to
address a group of 6 people).
With Strattera, I have expanded my focus period from less than a half hour
to over two hours. This is a step in the right direction. And I have
selected several writing projects for the coming year, adopting the ant's
"High Hopes" attitude of knocking it out one paragraph at a time.
But I am in tears often, realizing that I am watching myself trickle away a
little at a time, and knowing that I can only stall - I can't reverse what's
happening to me.
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Post by Honeysmom on Dec 12, 2003 11:53:08 GMT -5
I had a talk with DH this morning and he thinks I am not all the differnt that I used to be. He thinks (and I agree) now that I am taking meds I am noticing things I do. Like I tell him the same thing 4 times, or I mill around the house looking something, but I do not even know what. I have also been accused of speaking b-4 I think. I think that I am just noticing things that other have seen for years. I was going to talk with the doc this morning, but since it is -12 degrees here again, my car does not start and I had to cancel. We can talk about it at my next appt...January 22! I hate having to cancel  |
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Post by Douglas on Dec 12, 2003 13:23:03 GMT -5
Please continue to report on this, HM ... it is very interesting to see you becoming self-aware of your behaviors, and especially interesting to compare with observations from those around you ...
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Post by LitlBaa on Dec 17, 2003 1:53:43 GMT -5
Douglas, I read your post to Hubby...his comment was, "Powerful...I feel that way, too."
I'm trying to be supportive of him and his feelings, I'm trying to understand what's going on with him, but...I'm carrying such a heavy burden right now, we were both out of work for two months, the bills piled up, we're back at work now but haven't gotten paid yet, my DD also has ADHD and is involved in lots of different things, she has lots of homework, clarinet, and youth group, the house is a mess because one of them piles and the other scatters it, my ADHD dog (Jack Russell Terrier) tears through the house, buries chew bones in the laundry, and scatters his toys all over, lights are left on, the shower's running all day, people cook but don't clean up after themselves, it's Christmas and there's no money, I'm about 80 pounds overweight, I tore the ligaments in both feet last spring and still can't walk very well...when is someone going to be understanding of ME? When is someone going to take care of ME?
Sorry, I just needed to vent. I feel like I'm losing it, too, but if I do, the whole family crashes and burns.
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Post by susanthemom on Dec 17, 2003 3:26:38 GMT -5
Do you think it's just a bad case of the winter blues? Cause I'm hearing you loud and clear and practically on the verge of tears here. Don't feel like sleeping, don't feel like cleaning, don't feel like picking up after another cotton-picking person who doesn't want to find a trashcan or put their clothes anywhere but the middle of the floor. My back hurts, my temples ache ever so slightly, and the cat has disappeared again. My very nice neighbor is getting on my nerves , the hubby won't be home for Christmas this year, and I'm just bracing for the flu to hit us any minute now. I WANT MY MOMMY!!
Nevermind the stuff that actually requires any sustained thought, like bill paying or actual christmas shopping. I'm lost right now, not myself at all, and can't seem to get back on track. I would love to be just plain scatterbrained right now. All I want for Christmas is a solid 8 hrs. of sleep and happy little mood elevating light. Like Sorka says, "It's been an absolutely terrible, no good, very bad" holiday season.
Thanks for letting me join in the rant. Sorry to have gotten so off topic. My two cents.....bad case of seasonal depression with a side of fried brains. :-/Susan
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Post by Sorka on Dec 17, 2003 9:29:34 GMT -5
Wow people are still quoting me!! heheh I must be loved!
I also seem to feel this way too!!! I look at the house and all and think HOW DID I DO IT? I was employed full time two kids and a dog.. the house wasn't perfet but it was aceptable, dinner got cooked in a timely manner and the dishes and laundry didn't pile up too much!
But now I feel like I can't organize anything, I am home full time, but also homeschooling, and the least little thing seems to overwhelm me.
The bills the kids the dog's barking etc etc.. my husband has 'taken over' the dishes and laundry.. but that has fallen by the wayside.. I loaded and started the dishwasher this morning.. earlier in the week I had to do a few loads of laundry or go naked.. (mabye that's his plan) and also I had to do some dishes..
He is obsessivly working on a computer project (not for pay) and puttingoff items he could get paid for...
This is extra stuf beyond regular work.
So the rest is falling aside.
So it could be winter blues, it could be just more things going on it could be a touch of depression age ADD.. all of the above!
I think I will order the Fly lady journal and get somethings going with that!!
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Post by Douglas on Dec 17, 2003 9:44:57 GMT -5
Litlbaa, if your husband is anything like me, it's a timing thing. There are moments when I am completely unaware of what's going on with the people around me, the fog is so thick --- and other moments when all it takes is a look or a word, and I realize that someone close to me needs some time.
I think it depends on how you send out the signal that you need some support. A weary, tired-of-it-all signal from a woman is often embarrassing to a man --- it tells him that he has failed her, and this is humiliating (especially for an ADHD man) ... likewise, a signal heavy with frustration may trigger a shyness in him, a response of "oops, i've blown it somehow" ...
what men want is to feel needed ... the best signal to me that my loved one is overwhelmed and needs me is when she seeks me out and buries herself in my arms. The longer the moment, the more obvious it becomes to me ...
You have to understand, we men are slow ...
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Post by Honeysmom on Dec 17, 2003 10:23:51 GMT -5
I also think it is easy for men and women to get trapped in a sterotype. DH works lots and lots of hours. He goes a great job of supporting us. We gon't live a lavish lifestyle by any means, but we have the money for Christmas presents for the first time in a few years, and don't have to pay it off until August.
I stay home with the kids. My kids are still little only 2 and 4. They are ALOT of work and that job never ends. I think sometimes my DH forgets that and I never seem to remind him until I cannot take it anymore. He thinks he makes and money and it is my job to run the house. Problem with that is that running the house is a big job. I am not blamming him, but he has no idea how big of a job it is. Last month I made him sleep on the couch for 3 days b/c he said it is his job to make the money and my job to take care of the house, kids, dog, pay bill, grocery shop...the list goes on. He has changed his stand on that issue.
As far as getting down this time of the year I usually do to, but that is b/c Christmas is way more than Honey can handle in 2 days. I do not know if there is a med out there that can make Christmas OK for him. He will be so hyperactive and impulsive, and it just adds fuel to the fire. It is awful to say, but the only place I feel comfortable is on my mom's side b/c my cousin's son is also ADHD and he is not being treated in any way. No meds, no behavior mod, nothing natural, noting at all. They are in denial, so their son is always worse than mine. But of course they will ask again if Honey is on meds and they DH and my cousin will have words about minding each other's own business and making decisions best for the kids....it never ends!
But I am not going to get down this year. I am taking a vacation with my kids the week between Christmas and New Year's. Just me and them, I may be nuts. I have never been away from DH longer than when I stayed in hospital after I had the kids. I am going to visit a bunch of our family members on each side. I may come home completely grey or with a twitch but I'll live. ;D
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Post by Douglas on Dec 17, 2003 10:32:51 GMT -5
Becky, here's hoping your short tour does the trick! Keep your spirits up and don't let the uninformed dampen your determination to have a happy holiday!
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Post by rosyred45 on Dec 17, 2003 12:42:16 GMT -5
Which one of you stole my stool. That's not funny give it back now, please. I just feel like I get so over whelmed with everything, I've tried lists, post it notes, let it lay until the rightful owner picks it up(we won't go there  ). I think now the only thing that is motivating me is, nothing. I don't care, my husband doesn't care, from watching mom and dad, kids don't care. I'm at wits end. I don't have any dx, but I'm about to go get something. Wierd thing, not to get too personal about myself. Growing up, I used to take over the counter pain killers for my knees. I always wondered if there was anything that helps me being so scatter brained. I would get into a mind set and BOOM I'd spaz. I don't know. What I do know is that coffee is my savior, when I have aitgoing and drink coffee all day, stuff gets done. Love my coffee, going to make aitnow!! Kaiti |
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Post by susanthemom on Dec 17, 2003 19:03:32 GMT -5
LOL ;D Coffee, sweet nectar of the Gods. Reminds me of Brendan Frasier in George of the Jungle(popular movie around here), "JAVA JAVA JAVA JAVA JAVA JAVA....(with a manical look in his eye)" hehehe
Sorka, How could I ever forget you? That's was the cutest rewrite, still makes me laugh everytime I think about it. ;D
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