about having a baby

[wifeguy]

Sooo....my husband and i are recently married and we think about having kids....

I think my husband is more nervous then he should be because he thinks that his ADHD is going to for sure transfer to our children....

Just wondering...
How many out there have had children with ADHD and out ADHD themselves..

i even asked him one if he would like a girl or a boy and he said a girl (i think because he does not really think his adhd would transfer to a female)

[DanielsMom]

I was never "officially" dx as ADHD but I am, it was way worse when I was a child. And boy did I ever transfer it to my son. Big Time!! For that I deal with feeling of guilt. I don't know if it is always passed on to our kids or not. But I would recommend you talk to your doctor about that possibility. And maybe knowing this will happen ahead of time you can take more steps early on to help your child. I think that most of us didn't know until later 4-8???

[sierra]

Well if I knew then what I know now --

I'D STILL HAVE THEM!

One thing I'd probably do though is take the supplements recommended for ADHD starting before pregnancy just like folic acid. And I'd keep taking them while breastfeeding. I'd just be real careful with fish oil. Make sure it's one that has tested free of mercury and other contaminants like dioxins. There was a scary article about farm salmon just last week I think.

I don't know if it would help but it might.

[AnneM]

My son certainly is a carbon copy of his father ... both have exactly the same type of add/adhd.... I understand that add/adhd is hugely genetic ... the most common transference being from male to male BUT BY NO MEANS EXCLUSIVELY SO.... It also doesn't have to be directly from parent to child - My friend's son has adhd - his father doesn't - but his father's brother does!! ... so it can also come from "other relatives" ...

[Jorgy]

Don't not have kids because of ADHD! My son is the joy of my life and I woudn't have him any other way. Remind me of that in the morning.... Sue

[Dad2Brooke]

My wife has ADHD and so does my daughter. My wifes mother and father both have it, although they have never been diagnosed.

Yes Brooke is a handful, but even had I known that the ADHD was genetic, we would have still had her. And even though she has it, I wouldn't change a thing about her. (Did I manage to say that with a straight face.)

Actually, there are things I would change about Brooke if I could, but none of them are so major that I would give her up. She is the apple of my eye.

When I get home in the evening and she comes flying out of the house yelling, " Daddy's home, Daddy's home, Daddy home" and wraps me in a big bear hug, well, life just doesn't get any better than that. ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

[Jorgy]

Ralph, you big softy!

[Dad2Brooke]

LOL Jorgy

[eaccae]

DS is also a carbon copy of his father. The jury is still out on DD. But I still wouldn't change a thing. I have friends that are having just as much trouble with their nonadhd children as I am having with my adhd child. Different problems - but just as large! There are no guarantees! But it is sooooooooooo worth it!

Also - I haven't been officially diagnosed but I clearly have add (without the hyper), my half sister - different father - has adhd (with the hyper), and my full sister doesn't have either and is the most focused and organized person! So who knows what will happen.

[LitlBaa]

I didn't know anything about ADHD until my daughter was dx'd. Once I started reading and researching, I saw her father's behaviors in her. Didn't like that at all.

I've read several studies that say approximately 30% of men with ADHD have children with ADHD. My hubby has two grown boys, one has ADHD (I think) and one doesn't.

Honestly, I think it's a roll of the dice no matter what. If you want kids, have kids. Don't let a potential ADHD diagnosis stop you from doing what you want to do.

[vickilyn32]

My father is defidently ADHD, but undiagnosed, I think I may be inattentive, Husband dont know. DS is adhd, inattentive/impulsive. DD is not. I would not trade either of my kids. DS is very active and has some trouble in school, but is great at sports, has friends, is very artistic, and can hold a great conversation with an adult or child, Both kids are great with small children and love to be around them, and take great care of their dogs. Each child has a dog of their own. DD is good at dance and gymnastics and is a great student. I have had problems with both kids a diffrent times, but have also had great joys.

[mom2tj]

Yes I passed this on to so far one on my boys, It would not have changed a thing, I would have them just the same and would have more if I could. There is no guaranties in life (not to scare you ) but you dont know what life has in store for you I am just very greatfull that they are both healthy.

**by the way my sister's dauther has ADD and nor she or her DH has it, just to make it interesting.....


p.s. ADD & ADHD is not girl prouf!

[RiahBubbaPooh]

Dh is ADHD,
Riah is ADD (girl)
Bubba is ADHD (boy)
Pooh is ADHD (girl)

[catatonic]

Well, I'd have to say there's more than a pinch of ADHD in my own self. As for the kids, of the 3 boys, only one of them is ADHD, the other 2 have no problems of any type. The baby is a girl, just turned 3, so the jury is still out on her, but my gut feeling is we may have trouble there! Either that or I've forgotten how horrible 3--year-olds can be in the 7 years since the last one was that age. Wouldn't trade any of them for anything in the world though.

[Jenn]

I am undx'd ADD and my daughter is ADD and some LD and son is ADHD, ODD and some LD.